The Worst Summer of my Life by MichelleRadcliffe

Rating: PG13
Genres: Drama, Humor
Relationships: Harry & Hermione
Book: Harry & Hermione, Books 1 - 5
Published: 28/10/2004
Last Updated: 11/01/2005
Status: In Progress

Harry is at Grimmauld Place after fifth year and some - unexpected vistors show up... "You
are a very twisted, demented, and evil person, damned glad to meet you! Seriously though, funny
stuff, keep it up." - A Reviewer




1. Dun Dun Dun – The Plot Begins
--------------------------------



The Worst Summer of my Life


Rating: *PG-13* for swearing and some sexual innuendoes but nothing too bad
Status: in progress
Author: Michelle (PottersGirl13) (A/N1:)
Co-Author: Andrea (A/N2:)
Andrea helped my come up with some of the ideas so I feel it's only right to credit her.
Pairings: Harry/Hermione, Draco/Ginny (others you'll have to read and find out...I don't
want to give anything away...

Summary: It's the summer after fifth year and Harry has been staying at Grimmauld Place for the
summer and some visitors are coming. Some big twists are coming and hilarity ensues.

**PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING!!!**

Notes: Well, I just want to say before you read this that me and my friends wrote it for the fun
of it. It was not meant to be serious so don't feel bad if your favourite character has some
odd things happen to them. My favourite character has many bad things happen to him (It's Harry
by the way) and I laugh at it anyway so please enjoy. Nevertheless, I know I'm going to get
many flames. Please try to see the funny side of things and enjoy!

Now, to the story!

**Chapter One:** **Dun Dun Dun - The Plot Begins**

(A/N1: Okay, I'd just like to point out that if you don't like the first paragraph -
well, it's not like the rest of the story…)(A/N2: Michelle! You just started a story with an
A/N!!!)(A/N1: Well - it'll get me readers!)(A/N2: Good point…)Harry found himself staring at a
picture of Hermione once again. What was going on with him, because whatever it was, it was not
normal. Harry had been having strange `feelings' for her and it was freaking him out! He'd
been staying at Grimmauld Place since fifth year ended. It was already halfway through the summer
and he hadn't seen Ron or Hermione once. “HARRY!!!” Harry jumped and was torn out of his
depressing thoughts. He got up and walked down the stairs and came face to face with Narcissa
Malfoy (A/N2: How the hell does he know who she is?) (A/N1: He saw her at the Quidditch thingy…”)
(A/N2: Oh…)

Harry's' face changed from one of complete and utter shock to one very calm. He held up
one finger (A/N1: And no, it wasn't the middle one…what kind of person do you think Harry is?
Honestly!) and said in a calm voice “One second…” Harry walked out of the room and into the
kitchen. The second he shut the door he yelled, “WHAT THE HELL IS SHE DOING IN MY HOUSE?!?!?” Lupin
looked at him innocently. “I MEAN, WHAT WERE YOU THIN…..” Harry stopped mid-word. He started pacing
and running his hand through his raven black hair. “I'm going crazy…that's got to be it…I
mean, what else would…crazy…me…” Harry stuttered. “Finally come to terms with yourself, Potter?”
Said an annoying voice that could only belong to “MALFOY!” Harry said spinning around. Draco
shrugged and walked to the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of arrange juice. He smirked before
bring the bottle to his lips and drinking it right out of the container. Harry looked like he could
have killed.

Draco put the bottle back in the refrigerator and shrugged. “What are you doing?!?!?” Harry
screamed. (A/N1: Delayed reaction, lol) “Well, seeing as I'm going to be living…” Harry spun
around to face Lupin. “Lupin, what is he talking about? Because I know he's not talking about
staying…here.” At the sound of an annoying voice Harry spun around again (A/N2: He seems to be
doing a lot of that.) “That was what I was talking about…” Draco said plainly. “I thought I'd
make myself at home…” He said with a smirk. Harry threw his hands in the air and walked out of the
room quickly, muttering something about `not the only one' and `mental'. Lupin faltered for
a minute before walking out of the room after Harry. Draco smirked (A/N1: Wow, what a surprise,
Draco smirked!!!) (A/N1: Sarcasm)

Lupin caught up with Harry on the stairs. “Harry, I'm going to be gone for a week or so,
there are a few things I need to do…” Remus said. “You're leaving me alone with
*them*?!?!?” Harry asked, taken aback. “Well, no, Ron and Hermione are coming and I think
Ginny is too.” Harry breathed an audible sigh of relief. “Well, I'm leaving now, so I'll
see you in a week.” Lupin said with a quick smile before disapparating. Harry made his way up to
his room in a daze…Draco was in *his* house…

Hermione and Ron were at The Burrow getting ready to floo to Grimmauld Place. “Okay, do you have
everything?” Hermione asked him. Ron rolled his eyes and stepped into the fireplace. “Are you
coming?” He asked slowly. Hermione stepped into the fireplace. They threw down the floo powder at
the same time yelling `Grimmauld Place' at the same time. Hermione felt like she was going to
be sick from all the spinning. The landed together with a thud in the fireplace. Ron opened his
eyes slowly and Hermione was still rubbing at hers. She heard Ron gasp. “Hermione…am I
dreaming…or…I mean having a nightmare?” Ron asked, catching himself. “Or are we just at the wrong
house?” He asked slowly.

Hermione looked up. There in front of them stood Malfoy. Hermione groaned. “What are you doing
here?” She asked her hands on her hips. “I believe that's none of your business, Granger. For
this is not your house. If you'd get over your sickening shyness and marry Potter already then
you *could* ask me what I was doing here.” Hermione was at a loss for words as she watched
Draco walk out of the room. She turned to Ron who shrugged stupidly. “Since when do we listen to
him?” He asked walking into the kitchen.

Harry was sitting on his bed, slightly rocking back and forth when he heard his door open.
“Harry?” A voice asked. Harry turned around on his bed and saw Hermione standing in the doorway. A
smile consumed his face. “Hello.” He said getting off of his bed. “You do know Malfoy is down…” She
was cut off. “Don't remind me.” He said exasperatedly, rubbing his forehead. “So, what's
going on?” She asked sitting down on the bed. Harry was in a sort of trance. Harry watched her and
tried to listen but all he could think was `Hermione's on my bed. Hermione's on my bed.
Hermione's on my bed.' “Harry, are you okay?” Harry looked up at her. “Oh,
yeah…I'm…I'm fine…” Hermione rolled her eyes. “Well, you'd better come downstairs
because Ron is here and I think Ginny is coming too.” Hermione said walking out of the room. Harry
glanced back to see if he'd forgotten anything. `Hermione was on my bed…' He thought as he
walked out the door.

Ron was sitting downstairs in the kitchen…and…you guessed it…he was eating. He was also
completely oblivious to everything that was happening around him. Hermione walked in the room with
Harry behind her and walked straight over to Lupin. “So, what's he doing here?” Lupin furrowed
his brow. “Well, they have to get away from Lucious…and, well, who'd look for him here?” Lupin
asked her pointedly. Hermione sighed. “Well, this summer is going to be just GREAT!” Hermione said
sarcastically.

“Yeah, bloody fantastic.” Harry said rolling his eyes.

**Sneak Peak:**

*“…and this is Draco in the bath…and this is Draco after he wet the bed…and this is Draco
learning his ABCs…and this is Draco…..” Narcissa said pulling out pictures and showing them to
Hermione one at a time. “Umm…excuse me, Mrs. Malfoy, but these all look like they were taken
yesterday.” Hermione said uneasily. “Well, that's because they were, dear.”*

**A/N1:** Okay, I know there was a lot of A/Ns but I wasn't originally planning to even
let people read this. Me and my best friend (Andrea) have been working on this for quite a while
now so we just put A/Ns in whenever so ignore them if you're bugged by them please .

-->



2. The Chapter Where Narcissa Shows Everyone a Picture Of Draco
---------------------------------------------------------------



The Worst Summer of my Life


Rating: *PG-13* for swearing and some sexual innuendoes but nothing too bad
Status: in progress
Author: Michelle (PottersGirl13) (A/N1:)
Co-Author: Andrea (A/N2:)
Andrea helped my come up with some of the ideas so I feel it's only right to credit her.
Pairings: Harry/Hermione, Draco/Ginny (others you'll have to read and find out...I don't
want to give anything away...

Summary: It's the summer after fifth year and Harry has been staying at Grimmauld Place for the
summer and some visitors are coming. Some big twists are coming and hilarity ensues.

**PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING!!!**

Notes: Well, I just want to say before you read this that me and my friends wrote it for the fun
of it. It was not meant to be serious so don't feel bad if your favourite character has some
odd things happen to them. My favourite character has many bad things happen to him (It's Harry
by the way) and I laugh at it anyway so please enjoy. Nevertheless, I know I'm going to get
many flames. Please try to see the funny side of things and enjoy!

Now, to the story!

**Previously:**

*Hermione walked in the room with Harry behind her and walked straight over to Lupin. “So,
what's he doing here?” Lupin furrowed his brow. “Well, they have to get away from Lucious…and,
well, who'd look for him here?” Lupin asked her pointedly. Hermione sighed. “Well, this summer
is going to be just GREAT!” Hermione said sarcastically.*

*“Yeah, bloody fantastic.” Harry said rolling his eyes.*

**Chapter Two:** **The Chapter Where Narcissa Shows Everyone a Picture Of Draco Without his
Clothes On**

“Well, this summer is going to be just GREAT!” Hermione said sarcastically.

“Yeah, bloody fantastic.” Harry said rolling his eyes. Hermione walked out of the room leaving
Harry and Ron to figure things out on their own. Hermione was walking around the corner when she
ran into Narcissa. “Oh, hello.” Hermione said in a bored tone. “Oh, you're that Granger girl,
aren't you?” Hermione looked annoyed by this. “It's Hermione.” Hermione said. Narcissa
smiled. “Err - okay…” There was an awkward silence and Hermione shifted her weight. “Do you want to
see some pictures?” Narcissa asked an evil grin on her face. (A/N1: It must run in the family.)
Hermione, with nothing better to do, agreed and followed Narcissa up the stairs.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“…and this is Draco in the bath…and this is Draco after he wet the bed…and this is Draco
learning his ABCs…and this is Draco…..” Narcissa said pulling out pictures and showing them to
Hermione one at a time. “Umm…excuse me, Mrs. Malfoy, but these all look like they were taken
yesterday.” Hermione said uneasily. “Well, that's because they were, dear.” Narcissa said
smiling evilly to herself as Hermione fell off the couch clutching Hermione stomach and howling
with laughter. Just then, Ginny walked in the room. “What's so funny, Hermione?”

Ginny walked over to the couch and glanced over Narcissas' shoulder. “OH!!!...” Ginny burst
out laughing and then recovered standing up. “….um….Mrs. Malfoy…can I have that one of him in the
bath?” Ginny asked uneasily. “GINNY!” Hermione screeched. The door cracked open once again. “Mione,
why are you yel…” Harry walked over to her looking over a very happy Ginnys' shoulder. “OH, MY
GOD. IS THAT MALFOY NAKED?!?!?!? WHAT IS A PICTURE LIKE THE DOING IN MY HOUSE?!?!?!?!?” Harry
screamed holding his head in his hands. Ron stared at the picture, cocking his head to the side.
“Hmmmm” Ron muttered falling to the floor. (A/N: Little do they know that Ron passed out because he
was happy) (A/N: DUN DUN DUN!)

“Well, I kind of think he looks hot…” Ginny said still staring at her new picture. Everyone
whipped their head around in her direction and then tenderly rubbed the back of their necks.
“GINNY! THAT IN THE BLEEDING HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?!?” Harry and Hermione screamed at her.
Narcissa just sat and watched all this happen, laughing her head off. Ron sat up rubbing the back
of his head. “Uhh…What happened…what that a picture of?” He asked stupidly pointing to the picture
Ginny was still clutching.

“OH, MY GOD, MALFOY'S NAKED!!!” Ron yelled and then fell to the floor again. Draco strutted
into the room. “What are you all laughing at?” He asked slowly. Hermione gave him one look and
burst out laughing again. Draco looked at the stack of pictures and then at his mom and then to the
pile of pictures again with a look of absolute horror on his face. Everybody but Ron and Draco
burst into a laughing fit. Draco walked over to his mother gingerly. He leaned over her shoulder
with his eyes closed and then, biting his lip, opened them slowly. “MOTHER!!!” Draco yelled, seeing
the collection of pictures on his moms' lap, his voice getting high and squeaky.

“WHAT ARE YOU SHOWING THEM?!?!? OH, MY GOD, I'M NAKED IN THAT ONE!!! OH, MY GOD, THAT'S
THE ONE WHERE I HAD AN ACCI…” He stopped himself, then continued. “MOTHER, HOW COULD YOU SHOW THEM
THAT?!?!?” Draco said getting a strange look on his face. “Excuse me, but I need to die now!!!”
Draco said in a high pitched voice and he looked like he was going to cry. Draco ran out of them
room like a girl. “LET ME HELP YOU WITH THAT!” Harry yelled running after him. Ron, who had woken
up just in time to see Dracos' little breakdown yelled, “DON'T YOU THINK HE'S HAD
ENOUGH?!?!? WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE? HE'S JUST A BOY!!!” Ron screamed running out of
the room leaving an awkward silence and came back a few moments later with an angry look on hi
face. “I couldn't find him. I bet you made him feel really bad…” Ron said crossing him arms.
Everyone in the room gawked at him.

Harry had apparently walked back into the room and said calmly, “Okay, that right there…that was
messed up!” He said laughing. (A/N2: And now it's going to get even more messed up!
MWHAHAHAHAHA)

**Sneak Peak:**

*You're just going to have to wait on this one*

**A/N1:** Well, there's another extremely short chapter. I think the next one is a little
longer. There are in scenes basically because the plot to this story isn't really revealed
until much later. Keep in mind that I will probably post 1 every day unless I get no reviews.
I'm just really anxious to see what people think about this. It'll get funnier so don't
worry if you haven't laughed yet!

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3. The Chapter Where People From 1976 Come To Grimmauld Place a
---------------------------------------------------------------



The Worst Summer of my Life


Rating: *PG-13* for swearing and some sexual innuendoes but nothing too bad
Status: in progress
Author: Michelle (PottersGirl13) (A/N1:)
Co-Author: Andrea (A/N2:)
Andrea helped my come up with some of the ideas so I feel it's only right to credit her.
Pairings: Harry/Hermione, Draco/Ginny (others you'll have to read and find out...I don't
want to give anything away...

Summary: It's the summer after fifth year and Harry has been staying at Grimmauld Place for the
summer and some visitors are coming. Some big twists are coming and hilarity ensues.

**PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING!!!**

Notes: Well, I just want to say before you read this that me and my friends wrote it for the fun
of it. It was not meant to be serious so don't feel bad if your favourite character has some
odd things happen to them. My favourite character has many bad things happen to him (It's Harry
by the way) and I laugh at it anyway so please enjoy. Nevertheless, I know I'm going to get
many flames. Please try to see the funny side of things and enjoy!

Now, to the story!

**Previously:**

*Harry had apparently walked back into the room and said calmly, “Okay, that right there…that
was messed up!” He said laughing. (A/N2: And now it's going to get even more messed up!
MWHAHAHAHAHA)*

**Chapter Three:** **The Chapter Where People From 1976 Come To Grimmauld Place and Harry
has a Mental Breakdown**

Just then a portal opened up in the room and four people fell out. “I knew your dryer had
something wrong with it!!!” said a person who looked very familiar… Another boy got up off the
floor and everyone stood in awe. “Well, how was I supposed to know? I didn't even know what it
was for!!!” the boy yelled at the other. A girl with red hair sat up. “Good Lord, you two really
need to take muggle studies!” Another boy stood up revealing his face.

“Yes, I agree.” Said a young Lupin. “Oh, you would!” said a boy with raven black hair that
looked strikingly like Harry. “Ummm…..guys? There are, like, people looking at us.” Harry shook his
head. “Sirius?” He asked uncertainly. “Yeah, boy-who-looks-like-James?” Sirius asked. “YOU'RE
ALIVE!!!” Harry yelled wide-eyed. “Well, last time I checked I was.” Sirius answered
sarcastically…or, no, he wasn't being sarcastic…he really does check… Lily rolled her eyes.
“Hey, that's my job!” Lupin interjected. “Don't yell at Lily!!!” James retaliated. “James
Potter, I don't need you to stand up for me. I can take care of myself!!!” Lily said, crossing
her arms.

“Sorry, Lily.” James said looking down. “Sirius turned and whispered something that sounded a
lot like `whipped' in Lupins' ear, who, in turn, snickered. “Will someone please tell me
what's going on? Wait, no…I just need time…think…sleep…good.” Harry said walking out of the
room. Before Harry was completely out of earshot Sirius replied, “I would if I had any idea what I
was talking about…wait…” Lupin snickered. Harry walked back into the room in a sort of daze.
“Memory wipe good” He said drunkenly swaggering across the room.

Harry walked over to Lily. “Hey, what's your name?” He asked flirtily. Hermione looked as if
she was about to die and Ron had four hands covering his mouth. (Two of which were Hermiones')
“Lily Evans.” She said slightly annoyed. Harry snapped out of his daze. “Whatchu talkin' `bout,
Willis?” Harry asked alarmed. “Lily Evans.” She corrected causing Hermione to giggle. Harry got a
look of complete horror on his face. “Oh…..OH NOO OH NO OH NOOOOOOOO!!!!!” Harry cried crawling
into a fetal position and rocking back and forth. “What's that kid doing?” James asked
stupidly. Hermione walked over to him and whispered in his ear. “OH, MY GOD!!!!! You mean...” James
asked. Hermione nodded. “I don't get it!” Said yelled a confused look on his face. Hermione
whispered the same thing to Sirius. Crickets chirping in the background could be heard. “…I still
don't get it!” Sirius whined.

“I didn't think you were that thick!” Remus said seriously. “How did you know? She
didn't tell you.” Sirius said in awe. “I always know…” Lupin said in a mysterious voice. “Did I
do something to make that boy act that way?” Lily asked confused. “YEAH! YOU BECAME HIS MOTHER!!!”
James yelled falling over. “Oh…what…you mean we time traveled? EWWWW!!!” She yelled. (A/N2: Hey,
she's only 16…give her a break!) Ron had gone to look for Draco again after noticing that he
had not yet returned in all this commotion. He walked back in the room. “I still couldn't find
him, you should all be ashamed of…wait…who are all of you?” Ron asked pointing to the group of four
sixteen-year-olds on the one side of the room. “Lily Evans.” Lily said dully. “James Potter.” James
said in turn.

“Sirius…um…” Sirius scratched his head. Lupin sighed. “Black.” Lupin said annoyed. Sirius spun
around. “Black, what's black?!?!?” He asked panicking. “Your name…” Lupin said explaining.
“HEY, I KNEW THAT!!!” Sirius said with a pout. “Remus Lupin.” Lupin said. “Oh, well, those are all
nice names…wait… Oh! You're Harrys' parents and you're his godfather and you're his
old professor.” Ron said stupidly only to feel a smack in the back of his head as he turned to face
Hermione, yet, again, rolling her eyes. “Wow, this boy must be important if we all have something
to do with him…either that…or we all have no lives.” James said rubbing his chin.

Everyone was staring in awe, or maybe it was shock, at all these people. What the heck was going
on? Maybe they were all just dreaming…or...maybe not... Harry was still in his fetal position, Ron
was being worried about Draco, Hermione was trying her best not to feel jealous that Harry thought
his mom was hot and not her and also trying not to laugh at everyone else, Ginny had walked out of
the room and was looking for Draco, Narcissa muttered something about `better than cable'
(A/N1: She just knows what cable is, okay? Give me a break…), Draco was in the basement crying and
wondering if you really could die from embarrassment, Lily was…scared, James was snickering loudly,
Remus was rolling his eyes, and Sirius… Well, Sirius was confused…

“So, that sky today…talk about blue.” Sirius said breaking the silence. “So, who are all of
you?” James asked pointing at them. “Well, I'm Hermione Granger.” said Hermione proudly. This
time it as Rons' turn to roll his eyes. “Ron…uh.” Hermione muttered something that sounded like
`surrounded by idiots' and cut in. “Weasley.” She finished for him. “Oh, right.” Ron said
taking a sudden interest in his shoes. Harry was sitting on the floor finally out of his fetal
position. “Harry Potter.” He said dully not making eye contact with anyone. It felt weird having to
tell people who he was after six years of people telling *him* who *he* was. James leaned
over and whispered to Lily. “We name our son Harry?” He whispered. Lily shrugged. Harry was still
trying to process everything and was sitting on the floor in a sort of catatonic state.

Hermione was also trying to process it, but was having an apparently easier time doing just that
than Harry. She sat down beside him on the floor and rubbed his back comfortingly. Lily and
James…well, actually just Lily, sighed. “Awww.” She said looking at her son. (A/N2: He He He…that
was cute! Poor Harry!) Draco and Ginny walked back in the room hand in hand but no one seemed to
notice in all the commotion. “What did I miss?” He asked wiping a bit of lipstick off of the side
of his mouth.

“A LOT!!!” Everyone screamed at him. “Bloody hell, I always miss the good stu…HEY! What are all
of you doing here? Who are you?” He asked impatiently. Hermione coughed loudly but it sounded a lot
like `hypocrite' and Draco shot her a glare. Everyone sighed. “Lily Evans.” Lily said in a
slightly robotic voice. “James Potter.” James said his eyes still on Lily. “Sirius…Block….HA,
Moony, I remembered so HA!” Again crickets chirping. “It's BLACK!” Lupin yelled annoyed.
“BLACK?!?!? WHAT'S BLACK?!?!?” Sirius said spinning around and panicking. “YOUR NAME!” Everyone
in the room shouted. Crickets chirping once again.

“Remus Lupin.” Remus said in turn. “Oh, well, I know Lupin and Black but I don't know you
two.” Draco said pointing to Lily and James. Hermione sighed (A/N2: Everyone seems to be doing a
lot of that.) “Malfoy, what are Harrys' parents' names?” Hermione asked dully hoping
he'd get the point. “Do you really think I would know what Harrys' parents' names are?”
Draco asked pointedly. “James Potter and Lily Potter. I know because I'm obsessed with Harry.”
Draco murmured this last part under his breath. Draco bit his lip and Ginny leaned her head on his
shoulder. “What was that last part?” Hermione asked after recovering from choking on the water she
was drinking. “Nothing…err…I didn't say anything. Why would you think I said something?!?!?”
Draco cried defensively. Hermione rolled her eyes. “Okay then.” She said.

“Well, whatever Malfoy…” She continued. James sputtered. “Did you just say his name was
Malfoy?!?!?” He asked quickly. “Where's a Malfoy…There's a Malfoy in this house…We have to
get them and throw them out!!! Unless it's their house… Hey, whose house is this anyway?”
Sirius asked rubbing his head uncertainly. “Hey, there's nothing wrong with being a Malfoy!!!”
Narcissa and Draco yelled. “Being a Malfoy is the best thing you can be and I'm very spe…”
(A/N2: Man! He just goes on and on!!!) “Who are you two?” Lupin asked. Sirius and James looked at
each other in shock. “He actually doesn't know?!?” They asked together their eyes wide.

“Draco MALFOY.” Draco said putting an emphasis on Malfoy. “Narcissa Malfoy…Dracos' mum.” She
said with a smile. “Narcissa?!?” Lily screeched. “Oh, my God…is that really you?” Lily sat down on
the couch and James sat down beside her. “HEY! We're not married YET!” she said pushing him off
of the couch. Narcissa rolled her eyes. “You never told me whose house this is!!!” Sirius pouted.
Harry, who had broken out of his fourth trance that day said. “Well, this is your house, Sirius.”
He said realizing Hermione was sitting on the floor next to him. “Oh, I knew it looked familiar.”
Sirius said looking around. “YOU BROUGHT MALFOYS INTO MY HOUSE?!?!?” He cried suddenly.

“Well, actually, you died, and it's Harrys' house now.” Ron said bluntly. Hermione
elbowed him in the side…hard. “Ron!” She whispered loudly. Harry stood up. “So, you're Lily and
James Potter?” Harry asked stupidly. “Evans!” Lily said folding her arms. Harrys' eyes widened
as if he'd just realized something. “YOU'RE ALIVE!!!” He yelled loudly. “What is it with
you people? Of course we're alive!” Lily scolded throwing her hands in the air. Ron shuddered
and Harry looked like he could have cried. Hermione stood up and shot a glare at Lily. She walked
over to Harry and put an arm around his shoulder. She guided Harry out of the room leaving a very
perplexed Ron and another awkward silence.

**Sneak Peak:**

*Well…she found everyone. Apparently they were all very happy about something and were dancing
around the room. Sirius and James were wrestling…again…and Ron, Draco and Harry were jumping around
much in the form of ring-around-the-rosy. It was quite scary.*

**A/N1****:** My co-author will be adding her thoughts at the end as well on the next
chapter just to let you guys know. The next chapter is one of my favorites so be prepared! (The one
after that is my ALL-TIME favorite!!!) Also, if anyone has any ideas for a title let me know, okay?
You'd get the title if I'd tell you the last sentence in the story (which I won't)
:)

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4. The Chapter Where Draco is on a Mission to Find a Computer a
---------------------------------------------------------------



The Worst Summer of my Life


Rating: *PG-13* for swearing and some sexual innuendoes but nothing too bad
Status: in progress
Author: Michelle (PottersGirl13) (A/N1:)
Co-Author: Andrea (A/N2:)
Andrea helped my come up with some of the ideas so I feel it's only right to credit her.
Pairings: Harry/Hermione, Draco/Ginny (others you'll have to read and find out...I don't
want to give anything away...

Summary: It's the summer after fifth year and Harry has been staying at Grimmauld Place for the
summer and some visitors are coming. Some big twists are coming and hilarity ensues.

**PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING!!!**

Notes: Well, I just want to say before you read this that me and my friends wrote it for the fun
of it. It was not meant to be serious so don't feel bad if your favourite character has some
odd things happen to them. My favourite character has many bad things happen to him (It's Harry
by the way) and I laugh at it anyway so please enjoy. Nevertheless, I know I'm going to get
many flames. Please try to see the funny side of things and enjoy!

Now, to the story!

**Previously:**

*Just then a portal opened up in the room and four people fell out. "I knew your dryer
had something wrong with it!!!" said a person who looked very familiar... Another boy got up
off the floor and everyone stood in awe. "Well, how was I supposed to know? I didn't even
know what it was for!!!" the boy yelled at the other. A girl with red hair sat up. "Good
Lord, you two really need to take muggle studies!" Another boy stood up revealing his
face.*

**Chapter Four:** **The Chapter Where Draco is on a Mission to Find a Computer and Harry and
Hermione Make Out - Finally**

“Well, I'm going to bed.” Ron stated getting up. He walked out of the room and looked over
the banister to find Harry and Hermione. Hermione was up against the wall and Harry was pressing
his lips against hers. She didn't seem to be resisting either. Ron raised an eyebrow and
smiled. No, he wasn't jealous…of Harry (A/N: DUN DUN DUN! Lol, I'm just kidding!) He heard
someone say `ow' and walked quietly back to the banister. Glancing over it he saw Harry and
Hermione rubbing their foreheads. Ron chuckled (A/N2: lol, I like that word!) to himself and made
his way to his bedroom and laid down on his sleeping bag. Making himself comfortable he fell
asleep.

Back with the marauders James, Sirius and Lupin had gotten deep into conversation about
Malfoys' hair color. “It can't be…natural.” Sirius laughed. “Well…” Narcissa started. Draco
jumped up. “NOOOOOOOO!” He cried lunging for Narcissa. (A/N1: Imagine it being in slow motion)
Draco had his hand covering her mouth. Draco suddenly reeled back shaking his hand and yelling
ewww. “What was that?!?!?” Draco shrieked. “Well, that was me licking your hand.” Narcissa said
plainly. He looked at her like she was crazy. “What? You wouldn't let go.” She said with a
shrug. “You really haven't changed much from sixth year.” Lily said laughing.

Harry and Hermione walked back upstairs blushing furiously. They made their way to Harrys'
room. They hadn't spoken a word as the settled into bed. Hermione lay down on her sleeping bag
NEXT TO Harrys' bed. (A/N1: I just wanted to clear up that she wasn't sleeping with Harry).
They fell asleep not aware of the festivities going on next door. Narcissa had gone to her room and
was already fast asleep. With many threats from Lily, Sirius and James had finally stopped
wrestling.

Lily had claimed the couch and Sirius, James, and Lupin had found another room to sleep in.
Draco and Ginny were the only ones still up but Ginny was tired. “I'm tired.” Ginny said
yawning. “I'm going to bed.” She said sweetly kissing him on the cheek. Draco smiled and
watched her walk out the door. He waited a few before creeping out of the room in search of a
computer. Harry had to have on somewhere. He fought back the urge to pound on his door and ask. He
walked down the stairs and to a back room. “YES!” He cried pumping his fist into the air.

An hour later Ron heard shouting. Against popular belief he wasn't a heavy sleeper. He got
up groggily and headed downstairs. He saw light coming from the back room and walked, wand in hand,
slowly to it. He put his back against the door and listened intently. He waited until the person…or
thing…was at its' loudest. He jumped past the door and keeled over…..laughing. Draco was in the
middle of his victory dance when Ron had walked in. He stopped in the middle of another loud
`whoop' and his face quickly turned from matching his hair to matching Rons'. It was quite
a funny sight.

Ron was still on the ground laughing and Draco was slowly turning back to his original color.
With Ron still on the floor Draco walked back to the computer. He was muttering swear words at the
bright screen every few seconds and Ron sat up, perplexed. “What are you doing?” Ron asked
curiosity getting the better of him. “And what the hell is that?” He asked pointing to the strange
glowing box in front of him. “Well, I'm playing a game…and this is a computer.” He said his
eyes not blinking or looking away from the screen. “Oh…” said Ron pulling up a chair.

James woke up rubbing his eyes. “What the…” he whispered. He turned to Sirius. “Wake up!” He
said shaking him. “Five more minutes…” Sirius murmured. James smacked him in the head and walked
out of the room. Sirius muttered something that sounded like `why me?' and headed out of the
room after James. He caught up to him. “What?” He asked groggily. “I heard something.” James said.
They walked downstairs and to the back room. They walked in and caught Draco and Ron in the middle
of a victory dance. It was déjà vu as they pulled up a chair.

The very same thing happened once more that night. Only this time Harry woke up, walked
downstairs, and caught everyone in the middle of a victory dance. He laughed as he pulled up a
chair too.

Hermiones' alarm clock went off at 6:00 am sharp. She rolled her eyes and hit the `off'
button. Rubbing her eyes she got up and looked around. “Harry? Ron?” she asked. No one was there.
She grabbed her robe and walked out the door. She glanced around and didn't see anyone. The
only people she found were Remus, Lily and Ginny…and they were all still sleeping. She walked
downstairs to get some water. As she was opening the kitchen she noticed a light coming from the
back room. As she approached the door she heard a crash and hurriedly flung the door open.

Well…she found everyone. Apparently they were all very happy about something and were dancing
around the room. Sirius and James were wrestling…again…and Ron, Draco and Harry were jumping around
much in the form of ring-around-the-rosy. It was quite scary. She walked out of the room rolling
her eyes and muttering `boys'. Thankfully they hadn't noticed her. She ran into Lily. “What
are they doing?” she asked quietly. “You don't want to know…” Hermione said raising an
eyebrow.

**Sneak Peak:**

*“So, what do you want to do today?” Lily asked Hermione as she poured a bowl of cereal.
Hermione turned to face her. “SHOPPING!” they yelled in unison. Hermione turned to see Draco out of
breath. “Did…I hear…SHOPPING?!?!?”*

**A/N1:** Maybe you've noticed this story is NOT supposed to be in character very well.
It's supposed to be out there…that makes it FUNNY. I'm just explaining that this story is
not supposed to make sense so you can stop telling me that it doesn't.

**A/N2:** Well, I hope you guys liked the chapter. The next two chapters (part one: part two)
are one of my favorites too!!! Some people have been sending flames! You know you're not going
to piss us off by sending them. As said before we were fully expecting them. Thanks to everyone who
could see the funny side of things.

-->



5. The Chapter Where Everyone Goes Shopping and Harry Gets lots
---------------------------------------------------------------



The Worst Summer of my Life

Rating: *PG-13* for swearing and some sexual innuendoes but nothing too bad
Status: in progress
Author: Michelle (PottersGirl13) (A/N1:)
Co-Author: Andrea (A/N2:)
Andrea helped my come up with some of the ideas so I feel it's only right to credit her.
Pairings: Harry/Hermione, Draco/Ginny (others you'll have to read and find out...I don't
want to give anything away...

Summary: It's the summer after fifth year and Harry has been staying at Grimmauld Place for the
summer and some visitors are coming. Some big twists are coming and hilarity ensues.

**PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING!!!**

Notes: Well, I just want to say before you read this that me and my friends wrote it for the fun
of it. It was not meant to be serious so don't feel bad if your favourite character has some
odd things happen to them. My favourite character has many bad things happen to him (It's Harry
by the way) and I laugh at it anyway so please enjoy. Nevertheless, I know I'm going to get
many flames. Please try to see the funny side of things and enjoy!

Now, to the story!

**Previously:**

*Well…she found everyone. Apparently they were all very happy about something and were dancing
around the room. Sirius and James were wrestling…again…and Ron, Draco and Harry were jumping around
much in the form of ring-around-the-rosy. It was quite scary. She walked out of the room rolling
her eyes and muttering `boys'. Thankfully they hadn't noticed her. She ran into Lily. “What
are they doing?” she asked quietly. “You don't want to know…” Hermione said raising an
eyebrow.*

**Chapter Five:** **The Chapter Where Everyone Goes Shopping and Harry Gets lots of New
Clothes Picked out by Draco**

“So, what do you want to do today?” Lily asked Hermione as she poured a bowl of cereal. Hermione
turned to face her. “SHOPPING!” they yelled in unison. Hermione turned to see Draco out of breath.
“Did…I hear…SHOPPING?!?!?” He asked panting. “Umm…yes.” Lily said eyeing him. (A/N2: Not like
*that*… Wait…yes like that…mwahahahahaha) Draco jumped up and down like a five-year-old
screaming. “Can I go?!?!? Please, pretty please? I'll be good I promise…PLEASE?!?!?” Hermione
was at a lot of words. “Um, sure…” Lily said.

Draco walked back into the room. “So, did you beat level 234?” He asked Harry who was sitting in
the computer chair. “Don't…talk…almost…there…” Harry said concentrating on the game. Draco took
everyones' attention on the game as an opportunity to tell them all what he was doing. “I'm
going shopping.” He said quietly and he turned the knob on the door. “What?!?!?” Everyone whipped
around. There was an awkward silence.

“Game Over.” Said a robotic voice coming from the computer speakers. Lily poked her head in the
room. “Draco, are you coming?” She asked flirtily. James and Harry stood up so fast that they
knocked their chairs over. “I'm going!” they said in unison. Ron and Sirius stood up giving
each other a shrug. “I'll go too.” They said. “All right…so everyone's going…except for
Remus, Ginny and Narcissa because they're sleeping…” she said walking out of the room.

Lily walked into the kitchen. “Did it work?” Hermione asked giggling. “Yeah…like a charm!” She
said as she burst out laughing. “My mom and dad were supposed to bring my car in last
night…let's hope they remembered.” Hermione said sighing. Hermione walked into the hall where
all the boys were clamoring to get their shoes on. Hermione walked outside and, thank the heavens,
there was her car. It was a red mustang convertible…and it did not look capable of holding seven
sixteen-year-olds. Lily walked outside. “Wow, nice car, but do you think it will be able to hold
seven people?” she asked. Hermione had an evil grin on her face…Uh...Oh…

“OW! That was my foot!” Draco yelled. “Why did I absolutely HAVE to come?!?!?” Ron asked
himself. Hermione was driving and Lily was in the passenger side seat. The five boys were in the
back all squished together. Ron liked this a lot even though he didn't say…mostly because he
was sitting next to Draco…hmmm. “Are we there yet?” Harry and James asked in unison. “Could you
stop doing that? I'm getting to a point where I can't tell you two apart.” Hermione
laughed. (A/N1: Uh Oh…this might be a little bit of a problem…)

Hermione pulled into a mall parking lot and immediately all the boys jumped out except for Ron.
Lily and Hermione opened their doors and got out. “Ron? Aren't you coming?” Harry asked as he
was stretching. “Well, I would…except…I can't…really…move.” Ron sighed. Harry laughed. Everyone
else was walking away as Harry turned. Malfoy was ten feet and closing on Lily. “Sorry, mate!”
Harry said as her turned and ran. Ron made a movement that looked like he was going to throw his
hands in the air but he didn't. “Bloody hell.” He muttered to himself.

The group walked into the store and looked around. “So…uh…” Sirius started. “Well, I'm glad
Harry came…” Hermione said. Harry smiled at this. “…because he really needs new clothes.” She said
seriously (A/N2: he he he…) Harry had to agree, Dudleys' clothes just weren't cutting it
anymore…but still… “Hey!” a salesclerk yelled as she ran up to Hermione. Hermione smiled and gave
her a hug. “How have you been?” Hermione asked. “Well, this job rocks…and I get free clothes.
Ain't it great?” she asked. Hermione visibly flinched at the word `ain't'. She was
very…American… Harry thought. Hermione nodded. “Yeah, I've been with my friends…it's a
great break from my parents.” The girl nodded in agreement.

“Speaking of which…which one's Harry?” She asked. Hermione blushed furiously. Harry
stiffened. “Wait, no…let's see here.” She walked past Hermione and put her hand at her chin.
She eyed all the boys up and down. “Okay…Hermione…this isn't fair…you didn't say he had a
twin…” Hermione burst out laughing and the girl turned around. “What?” she asked confusedly. “He
doesn't.” Hermione said straightening a bit but still giggling. “Then…well…he…” Hermione
stopped her. “I'll explain later.” Hermione smiled at her. The girl turned around looking
closely at Harry and James. (A/N1: Harry's scar is hidden right now by the way)

After having them spin around she smiled and pointed at Harry. “You're Harry.” She said as
if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “How?” Harry asked suspiciously. “Well, there are
the eyes…and there's the scar…and then, of course…the…” She gave a sideways glance at Hermione
whose eyes widened. “Ass” Megan said before getting tackled by Hermione. She quickly got up and ran
for her life as Hermione pulled out her wand. (A/N2: That must look pretty odd…a girl chasing
another girl with a stick…lol) Everyone besides Harry was on the floor howling with laughter.

Hermione caught up with Megan and tackled her to the ground. Before Hermione could avada kedavra
Megan explained. “Hey, I'm sorry; you know me and how my foot likes to live in my mouth.” Megan
sighed when Hermione let her go. “You, know…I don't think he looked upset about it…” Megan said
with a grin.

“Well, Megan, last night I was going to tell him, right, and I led him out of the room so I
could talk to him in private. Anyway, we walked downstairs to get something to eat before we went
to bed, so, before we went into the kitchen I was determined to tell him. “Harry?” I asked. He
turned to look at me. I opened my mouth to tell him and then he leaned in to kiss me.” Megan
squealed. “Really?!?!? Oh, my gosh, was that your first?” she asked in an excited voice. “Yeah…”
Hermione said in a dreamy voice. “And that thing about fireworks…it's true.” Hermione smiled.
“So that's it…no follow up anything? He didn't say anything? You didn't say anything?”
she asked anxiously. “Well, no…” she said.

Back with the rest of the group Draco had really gotten into the whole `Harry needs new
clothes' thing. He was going through racks and racks of clothes looking at Harry every once in
a while. “No…no…too big...too small…clashes with the eyes…Oh! That's so *not* his color!”
Draco gasped. He went through the clothes so fast that Harry couldn't even see them. Everyone
else had gone looking around for other things. Hermione appeared beside Harry. “What are yo…” she
stopped mid-word. “That would be such a fashion disaster!” Draco said gasping. Hermione nearly fell
over. “Oh…my…God.” She said. “Tell me about it…” Harry said rolling his eyes.

**Sneak Peak:**

*James and Sirius saw Hermione glaring at them and gingerly walked back to the car. “Now, that
did you take?” Hermione asked James in a motherly tone. “His chew toy…” James said solemnly. “YEAH!
Give it back!” Sirius whined. Hermione had a confused look on her face as James handed Sirius a
rubber steak.*

**A/N1:** This is one of my favorites! The next chapter is my absolute favorite so look
forward to that . Thanks to most of you for your great reviews! I hope you all had a nice Halloween
with a bonus sugar high ;)

**A/N2:** This is one of my favourites too! OMG, Michelle, I didn't know you changed that
part where Megan tries to `Guess Who'…wow… It was funny though

-->



6. The Chapter Where James Gets Stuck in a Dryer and Draco is F
---------------------------------------------------------------



The Worst Summer of my Life

Rating: *PG-13* for swearing and some sexual innuendoes but nothing too bad
Status: in progress
Author: Michelle (PottersGirl13) (A/N1:)
Co-Author: Andrea (A/N2:)
Andrea helped my come up with some of the ideas so I feel it's only right to credit her.
Pairings: Harry/Hermione, Draco/Ginny (others you'll have to read and find out...I don't
want to give anything away...

Summary: It's the summer after fifth year and Harry has been staying at Grimmauld Place for the
summer and some visitors are coming. Some big twists are coming and hilarity ensues.

**PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING!!!**

Notes: Well, I just want to say before you read this that me and my friends wrote it for the fun
of it. It was not meant to be serious so don't feel bad if your favourite character has some
odd things happen to them. My favourite character has many bad things happen to him (It's Harry
by the way) and I laugh at it anyway so please enjoy. Nevertheless, I know I'm going to get
many flames. Please try to see the funny side of things and enjoy!

Now, to the story!

**Previously:**

*Hermione appeared beside Harry. “What are yo…” she stopped mid-word. “That would be such a
fashion disaster!” Draco said gasping. Hermione nearly fell over. “Oh…my…God.” She said. “Tell me
about it…” Harry said rolling his eyes.*

**Chapter Six: Shopping:** **The Chapter Where James Gets Stuck in a Dryer and Draco is
Faced with a Terrifying Decision**

Sirius and James were out of the department store and were wondering around the rest of the
mall. They saw a store called `Best Buy' and walked in. Their eyes widened as they looked at
the big screen TVs at the top of the back wall in awe. They walked around for about ten minutes
before either said anything. “HEY!” Sirius yelled. James turned around and saw a section that was
just dryers. They walked down one aisle before Sirius got an idea. “Maybe we can get back.” He said
plainly. “Hey, good idea!” James said energetically.

“DON'T I GET A SAY IN THIS?!?!? Harry yelled at them. Yes, them. Hermione had gotten into it
too. “too…” Draco had started. “No…no…” Hermione was in the middle of saying. “NO!” Draco and
Hermione yelled together at Harry and went back to muttering to themselves. They stopped when they
heard sirens outside the mall. They heard yelling inside the mall (A/N1: Be warned…this is NOT a
plot!) and walked to the inside entrance to the store they were in. They glanced over the banister
and saw that firefighters were running into `Best Buy'.

“Come on!” Hermione said forcefully. They ran to the escalator and went down. Hermione turned to
see Draco still standing at the top. “What are you doing?” Hermione yelled up to him. “What
*is* it?” Draco asked in a scared voice. “It's an escalator…not COME ON!” Draco folded his
arms. “No. Muggles are dumb…this couldn't possibly be stable…and it's *moving*.”
Hermione rolled her eyes and motioned for Harry to come along. Harry shrugged and followed Hermione
to `Best Buy'. They ran in the door and their eyes were immediately directed to a large crowd
by the dryers. They made their way through the crowd and saw James' butt sticking out the end
of a particularly small dryer.

Sirius was laughing hysterically. “…yes…we have a boy…about sixteen…he's uh…stuck in a
dryer…over.” Hermione heard in the background. She laughed as the firefighters pulled on James'
legs to free him of his aluminum cell of doom. Harry was close to tears as James fell to the floor
with a `thud' and an `ow'. He got up and rubbed his head. Sirius and James took off around
the back and Harry and Hermione wade their way out of the separating crowd. They found them in the
washer section. “If you tell anybody…you're grounded.” James said sternly after a pause. “You
can't ground me! I'm the same age as you!” Harry cried. “Well…well, I… You better run!”
James said in a dark tone.

I could so take you.” Harry said with a snort and crossed his arms. “Yeah, well, I…” James
looked like he was thinking hard. Harry made a face of mock terror. Hermione rolled her eyes and
left the store unnoticed. Sirius had made himself comfortable on top of a washer and was watching
with interest. Harry ran around the corner. “Come and get me old man!” He yelled standing at the
end of an aisle. “WE'RE THE SAME AGE!” James yelled running down the aisle after him. “Oh, so
now you agree with me.” Harry said dashing around the next corner…and running into the manager.

Hermione had gone back up the escalator to find Draco still staring at it with fright. “Good
Lord, it's an escalator!” Hermione said throwing her hands in the air. “This kid, he told me
that if you touch the yellow line, that it will eat your shoes!” Draco said his eyes wide. Hermione
rolled her eyes. She decided to just go against specifically what he said instead of stating the
many reasons why that was physically impossible. “So? They're just shoes!” Hermione said with
annoyance. “But these are my favorite shoes! I bought them two weeks ago! And they were on sale!”
Draco said with a pout. Okay, not working. “That's not even POSSIBLE!” Hermione yelled at him.
“Yeah, that kid said it happened to his cousin once.” Draco said in horror.

“He was never the same. Tragic.” Draco said shaking his head in pity. “Okay, what do you want?
What do you want if you go down the escalator?” Hermione asked in defeat. Bribery! How pathetic!
Draco had an evil grin on his face. “I want…to drive.” Hermione rolled her eyes again. “Fine.” She
said in defeat. She watched as Draco slowly stepped on the escalator with one foot, leaving the
other foot on the tile. It pulled his foot farther and farther away until he almost fell but
grabbed onto the rail for dear life. He straightened up a bit by the middle and looked simple giddy
by the end. Before his feet could touch the yellow line he jumped up a stair and another and
another until he was at the top again.

Hermione walked back into the store and looked around. Harry, Sirius, and James walked solemnly
to where she was. “What happened?” Hermione asked her hands on her hips. “Well, um…we…uh…” Harry
stuttered. “We got kicked out of Best Buy.” James said his right eye twitching. “Well, we got
kicked out for running.” Harry said looking down at the floor. “Actually, *you* got kicked out
for running.” Sirius said with a laugh. “Well, you got kicked out for sitting on a washer!” James
said annoyed. “Yeah! Well…so!” Sirius said defensively. Hermione rolled her eyes.

Changing the subject Harry looked up. “Draco is down the escalators…He won't touch the
yellow line at the bottom and he keeps jumping back up the stairs every time he gets close.” Harry
said with a snicker. “Well, at least he's not scared of them anymore.” Hermione said plainly
looking through more clothes. Sirius and James raised their eyebrows and walked away. “Well, at
least I don't have to try on all these clothes…” Harry trailed off motioning to a cart full of
shirts and pants…among other things. “That's what you think.” She said pushing him in the
direction of the dressing rooms. “Oh, no…you can't make me!” Harry said fearfully yet
forcefully.

“How did she make me?!?!?” Harry asked putting his head in his hands. Hermione was at the
counter paying for almost everything he'd tried on, well, except the pink shirt, he refused,
even though Hermione insisted that it was `salmon' and that it looked `cute' on him. He
didn't even want to think about all the things her friend, who she'd introduced as Megan,
said. Thankfully, Lily had gone out to the car. Hermione walked over to where Harry was standing
carrying three large bags of clothes. Harry took two out of sheer politeness because he was
`mad' at her now… They walked out of the mall, Harry with a slight frown. They saw Ron still
sitting in the car and Sirius and James were chasing each other around the parking lot. “GIVE IT
BACK!!!” Sirius yelled as James whipped around a van. Lily was sitting at the side of the car
rubbing her temples. “They…won't…stop…” She said with a growl.

James and Sirius saw Hermione glaring at them and gingerly walked back to the car. “Now, that
did you take?” Hermione asked James in a motherly tone. (A/N1: Hmm…imagine that…) “His chew toy…”
James said solemnly. “YEAH! Give it back!” Sirius whined. Hermione had a confused look on her face
as James handed Sirius a rubber steak. When Sirius grabbed it out of his hand it made a squeaking
noise. Hermione sighed and got in the car. “So, Ron, are you really still stuck?” She asked
laughing. “Yes.” Ron said with a pout. Harry had already put the bags in the trunk and after much
rearranging, they actually fit. He got in the back seat and say between James and Ron. Lily got
into the passenger side seat and Hermione turned on the engine. “Wait…where's Draco?” Ron
asked. Hermione turned the car back off and ran inside leaving everyone in a fit of giggles.

Hermione ran inside waving a quick hi/bye to Megan. She ran through the store and found Draco
outside the entrance riding down the escalator. “DRACO BERNICE (A/N2: lol) MALFOY!” Hermione
screamed as a few people gave her weird looks and then went back to their lives. Draco was back at
the top in a matter of milliseconds. “What…did…you…say?” Draco asked between gritted teeth.
“Bernice.” Hermione said with an evil grin. “I don't know what…” Draco started before Hermione
put her hand up. “Come off it, your mum told me yesterday.” Hermione said grinning evilly. “Her.”
Draco said darkly his eyes shrinking to slits.

Hermione ran back out to the car with Draco behind her. She hopped in the front. “HEY!!! You
said **I** could drive!” Draco said folding his arms. “I lied.” Hermione said turning the engine
on once again. Draco begrudgingly got in back and found himself squished into the side of the
car.

**Sneak Peak:**

*James and Sirius burst through the door of the sitting room which immediately shut up all
three girls. “You guys want to play a game?” James asked mysteriously. “Um, it all depends…”
Hermione said suspiciously. “Well, it's a muggle game… and it involves a bottle… You have to
agree now or be bored the rest of the night…”*

**A/N1:** Andrea is at the football game tonight so she's not going to have an authors
note. Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter and I hope to have the next one up either Friday or
Saturday. I have gotten some flames but that's alright. *blushes and giggles* Flamers are
morons so you know...if you want to be a moron don't let me stop you ;)

-->



7. The Chapter Where Everyone Plays a Little Game And Harry has
---------------------------------------------------------------



The Worst Summer of my Life

Rating: *PG-13* for swearing and some sexual innuendoes but nothing too bad
Status: in progress
Author: Michelle (PottersGirl13) (A/N1:)
Co-Author: Andrea (A/N2:)
Andrea helped my come up with some of the ideas so I feel it's only right to credit her.
Pairings: Harry/Hermione, Draco/Ginny (others you'll have to read and find out...I don't
want to give anything away...

Summary: It's the summer after fifth year and Harry has been staying at Grimmauld Place for the
summer and some visitors are coming. Some big twists are coming and hilarity ensues.

**PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING!!!**

Notes: Well, I just want to say before you read this that me and my friends wrote it for the fun
of it. It was not meant to be serious so don't feel bad if your favourite character has some
odd things happen to them. My favourite character has many bad things happen to him (It's Harry
by the way) and I laugh at it anyway so please enjoy. Nevertheless, I know I'm going to get
many flames. Please try to see the funny side of things and enjoy!

Now, to the story!

**Previously:**

*Hermione ran back out to the car with Draco behind her. She hopped in the front. “HEY!!! You
said* **I** *could drive!” Draco said folding his arms. “I lied.” Hermione said turning the
engine on once again. Draco begrudgingly got in back and found himself squished into the side of
the car.*

**Chapter S****even:** **The Chapter Where Everyone Plays a Little Game And Harry has A
(nother) Mental Breakdown**

Hermione walked in the door and was greeted by a tired looking Ginny. “Where were you?” she
asked accusingly. “Well, I went shopping.” Hermione said. Ginny rolled her eyes. “And I suppose all
the guys just jumped at the chance to go too so you decided to leave me here?” Ginny asked
sarcastically. “Actually, yeah” Hermione said with a shrug. Harry walked in the door lugging three
large bags of clothes. He flung them in a closet and with a glare from Hermione muttered, “I'll
get it later,” And started up the stairs. “Hey, Harry, do you want some lunch?” He heard Ginny yell
from the kitchen. Harry scoffed. It was **his** food to offer! “Err - no thanks…maybe later.” He
said politely walking to his room.

Hermione, Ginny, and Lily had finished eating and were in the sitting room…you'll never
guess…sitting. “I'm so bored!” Ginny groaned. “Yeah, me too, where's Harry?” Lily asked
Hermione. Hermione suddenly perked up at the mention of Harry. “How would I know? I don't
always know where he is! What would make you think I know? Why not ask Ron?” Hermione said
defensively. “I was just asking, I'm worried, doesn't he seem a little depressed?” shooting
Ginny a look that clearly meant `denial'. “Yeah, he's always like that.” Ginny said with an
eye roll. “Well, I'm just…” Hermione cut Lily off. “He's upstairs in his room thinking
about everything that's happened today and wondering what James and Sirius are up to.” Hermione
said as if this was the most obvious thing in the world. Ginny and Lily stared at her with their
mouths hanging open. “What?” Hermione asked innocently.

James and Sirius burst through the door of the sitting room which immediately shut up all three
girls. “You guys want to play a game?” James asked mysteriously. “Um, it all depends…” Hermione
said suspiciously. “Well, it's a muggle game… and it involves a bottle… You have to agree now
or be bored the rest of the night…” James said annoyingly. Hermione thought for a moment. This
reminded her of something… Why couldn't she remember? “Sure.” Ginny said standing up. “Yeah,
okay.” Lily agreed. Hermione rolled her eyes and silently hoped it wasn't too bad. “Ooo…”
Before Hermione could finish Sirius cut her off. “Great! I'll see you all upstairs in the
living room in a couple of minutes!”

Hermione, Ginny and Lily made their way up the steps to the living room. “Hermione, do you have
any idea what this game is?” Ginny asked becoming slightly suspicious. “Yeah, it sounds vaguely
familiar but I just can't seem to put a finger on in…” Hermione said thoughtfully. Lily opened
the door and saw that Draco, Ron, James, Sirius and Lupin had already arrived. “So, what are we
playing?” Lily asked uncertainly. “Well, you spin this bottle here and then whoever it lands on…”
James was cut off. “I'll be right back.” Sirius said. “Yeah, me too, be right back.” Lupin
agreed. They ran out of the room and returned dragging Harry behind them. “Oh…NO! NO!!! Last
time…Dudley…girls…lipstick…” Harry visibly shuddered.

Harry unwillingly sat down in the circle formed by Draco, Himself, Ron (who had only agreed to
come if Draco played…whether he admits it or not…it looked like they knew what game they were
talking about ::winkwink: Sirius, James, Hermione, Ginny and Lily. Lupin had decided that he'd
rather talk to Narcissa than play this game. “It's called spin-the-bottle…” James started.
Hermione got a look of realization on her face. “There aren't enough girls.” Hermione said
getting up. “There can be one less.” Sirius said with a pout. “So, there are TWO less.” Hermione
said pointedly. “Fine, then James won't play.” Sirius said pushing him over. “Hey! That's
not fair! Why don't you not play? You could go chase a cat!” James said stifling a laugh.

Sirius crossed his arms defensively. “That was once.” Sirius said his arms still crossed.
“Twice.” James corrected. “Well, actually it was three times…remember? Once when Mrs. Figg…” James
started with a snigger before Sirius cut him off. “OKAY! Now, who's going first?” Sirius said
quickly changing the subject. Mp once noticed Harry trying to slip out the door unnoticed. Hermione
glanced around. “HARRY!” she yelled. “I'm not playing unless he's playing!” Hermione said
immediately clapping her hand over her mouth. Thankfully no one noticed and Harry sat back down
with a groan.

“I'll go.” Lily said exasperatedly. She spun the bottle and it landed on James. She sighed
and stood up. She walked over to him and bent down kissing him on the cheek before James pulled her
down on top of him. He kissed her full on the mouth and she kissed him back thinking something
along the lines of `the hell with it'. Harry ran out of the room screaming, “MY EYES, MY
EYES!!!” Hermione sighed. “OKAY!!! On with the game PLEASE!!!” James and Lily sat up and glaring at
her, James spun the bottle. It landed on Hermione. “Uhhh…” She stammered.

She stood up and then squatted down beside him. She was about a foot away from him before she
threw her hands in the air. “This is WAY too weird!!!” She exclaimed loudly backing out. Ginny
giggled. “Why don't you just pretend he's Harry?” She asked with a smirk. (A/N1: I think
she's been around Draco just a tad too much…) Hermione shot Ginny a glare that would make any
boy run for his life but Ginny just giggled. “You know what, I'm not going to play…tell me when
you decide to play something that doesn't involve me kissing my best friends dad…” Hermione
said think that it sounded much more twisted now that she'd said it aloud.

Hermione made her way to Harrys' room where he was most likely sleeping. She wound around
the corner and glanced into where Narcissa was and found that she was writing something so she just
let her be. She wandered through the hall where she found Lupin sitting in the drawing room reading
a book. She smiled and made her way to Harrys' room. She opened the door and saw that Harry was
indeed sleeping.

She studied his face and absently pushed a lock of raven black hair off of it revealing that
thin scar. Hermione traced it with her finger as a silent tear slid down her cheek (A/N1:
MWHAHAHAHAHA. MUSHY!). She stepped back to see Harry smile and make a sad attempt to cover it up.
She breathed out heavily. “HARRY!” She yelled annoyed. “Don't DO that!” Hermione said crossing
her arms. “But, Hermione, it's just so fun…” Harry said innocently. His smile faded when he saw
a wet streak on Hermione's face. “Were you crying?” Harry asked a frown fixed on his
features.

Hermione turned away. “No…” She said stubbornly. Harry got up and slid his arms around her
shoulder. “Hermione, you don't have to feel bad for me… I'll be fine.” He said almost as if
he was convincing himself as well as Hermione. “You can't promise that…” She said wiggling out
of Harry's embrace. “Yes I can.” Harry said grabbing her and spinning her around. Before
Hermione could reply he kissed her on the lips gently. Hermione's hand ran through Harry's
raven black hair. Just then the door opened revealing a proud looking James and a not-so-happy
Lily.

Harry and Hermione dove for opposite ends of the room but were too late. Hermione, aware that
they were caught, started fiddling with her hair. “What's going on here?” Lily asked them
crossly. “Noth…nothing.” Hermione stuttered. “Then explain to me why Harry is wearing lipstick.”
She said with her eyebrows raised. Harry faltered for a second before saying, “Well, I thought it
would make me look pretty.” causing Hermione to giggle. “Hey, my son's a ladies man.” James
said with pride. Lily smacked him in the arm and Hermione laughed but turned it into a cough just
in time causing Harry to glare at her. “Harry, you are much too young to be doing these sorts of
things!” Lily scolded stepping so that she was about three feet in front of him.

“Now, you and James were practically going at it before, so why don't you stop being such a
hypocrite?” Hermione asked stepping between Harry and Lily with her hands on her hips. By this time
James had already slipped out of the room. “That was different; we're going to get married.”
Lily said triumphantly. “Well, who's to say me and Harry aren't?” Hermione asked in an
obvious tone. Lily opened her mouth as if she was going to retort but quickly closed it and stomped
out of the room slamming the door behind her. Harry was sitting in the corner with a look on his
face that clearly meant he was, not only confused, but also a little scared.

There was an awkward silence until Lily poked her head through the door. “By the way, the reason
we were up here in the first place is that Sirius suggested another game. I've played it before
and I liked it. It's called Truth or Dare.” Lily said quickly before shutting the door.
Hermione looked up at Harry. “Do you want to play?” She asked hopefully but hid it enough that
Harry wouldn't be able to see it. “Well, why not?” He said with a shrug.

**Sneak Peak:**

*“Ooh…me…me…over here! I know you can see me…so don't pretend you can't, Ron!” Sirius
shouted with his hands waving in the air. “Fine! I pick Sirius.” Ron said with a sigh. “YAY!!! What
do I win?” Sirius asked…ahem…seriously. ((A/N1: *insert rim shot here*) “Nothing.” Ron said rolling
his eyes. “That bites…I wanted something…not I don't want to go!!!” Sirius whined. “Okay
then…truth or dare?” Ron asked. “Well, which one is better?” He asked looking around. There was a
silence. “Okay! Nobody answer me then!” Sirius said crossing his arms.*

**A/N1:** Sorry everyone for how late this is. The flu has been going around and I've
been feeling like crap the past week. I haven't gotten to talk to Andrea today so no authors
note for her. I really hope you liked this chapter and the next one is promised to be up on by
Tuesday. Either really late Monday night or about 10:00pm Central time (US) Tuesday night. Thought
it's probably the latter. Sorry guys!

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8. My Big Exciting Day - An A/N
-------------------------------



My Big Exciting Day

A long A/N by:

Michelle

Hey everyone, as I said before this story is a little more personal for me and Andrea because we
get a lot of ideas out of real life. I'm going to upload the next chapter today so don't
worry. Anyway, I wanted to share my day with you…or part of it anyway. Okay…here goes. I got up and
went to school (that went off without a hitch) and went through my first hour class.

So I go to my next class with my most hated teacher Mrs. Dinger (Don't feel bad for laughing
at her name…in fact…I encourage it ;) ) So class goes on for a while with nothing too bad
happening. Then BAM - Mrs. Dinger did it…she made a reference to Harry Potter… Andrea sits behind
me and we were both trying not to laugh because we were thinking of this story. So she was talking
about writing summaries and blah blah blah…

I didn't really listen to her since me and Andrea were both gawking at the overhead. So she
lists four movies (that were pre-written/pre-printed) on the overhead and tells us we have to write
a summary (one or two sentences) about it. Well, here's me, trying not to get in trouble for
laughing and people start making fun of it around me. Don't worry, guys, I refrained from
maiming anyone…I won't lie…I *was* very tempted though. So I'm trying to ignore them
when Taylor (a guy in my class) starts calling him Harry Pothead…*cough* I hated him before…no,
really, I did.

So I'm trying to concentrate on writing my one or two sentences (although if I set my mind
to it I could probably write most of the script) of a summary. I was debating with myself in my
head. `Okay, you have to write about Harry Potter, come on, it's so obvious you want to'.
`If she makes us read it aloud then I'll be laughed at because the kids in this class are ass
holes that wouldn't know a good book if it bit them in the ass (that could be arranged…). `But
you must be faithful to your obsession!!!' I scolded myself.

Here's what I wrote:

*Harry finds out he's a wizard and gets taken to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and
Wizardry where many troubles await him.*

It felt so wrong making myself look like an idiot when it comes to Harry Potter. So people are
still commenting on how geeky Harry Potter is and Mrs. Dinger laughs at what they say only
furthering my hatred towards her. Then she doesn't even read my summary which made me mad and
then the ball rang.

So there I am just walking through the hall and this girl whose last name was Potter (it said on
the back of her Raider (school) sweater) I was very interested to know if she had a brother I could
marry so I could have that last name but I didn't ask for fear of being laughed at.

So the lesson today, boys and girls, WE MUST UNITE AND RID THE WORLD OF THOSE EVIL HARRY POTTER
HATERS…*cough*

I mean, eat your veggies so you grow **big** and **strong**.

<3 Michelle <3

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9. The Continuation of the Last Chapter Where Rons Secret is Th
---------------------------------------------------------------



The Worst Summer of my Life

Rating: *PG-13* for swearing and some sexual innuendoes but nothing too bad
Status: in progress
Author: Michelle (PottersGirl13) (A/N1:)
Co-Author: Andrea (A/N2:)
Andrea helped my come up with some of the ideas so I feel it's only right to credit her.
Pairings: Harry/Hermione, Draco/Ginny (others you'll have to read and find out...I don't
want to give anything away...

Summary: It's the summer after fifth year and Harry has been staying at Grimmauld Place for the
summer and some visitors are coming. Some big twists are coming and hilarity ensues.

**PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING!!!**

**Notes: Well, I just want to say before you read this that me and my friends wrote it for the
fun of it. It was not meant to be serious so don't feel bad if your favourite character has
some odd things happen to them. My favourite character has many bad things happen to him (It's
Harry by the way) and I laugh at it anyway so please enjoy. Nevertheless, I know I'm going to
get many flames. Please try to see the funny side of things and enjoy!**

Now, to the story!

**Previously:**

*“I'll go.” Lily said exasperatedly. She spun the bottle and it landed on James. She
sighed and stood up. She walked over to him and bent down kissing him on the cheek before James
pulled her down on top of him. He kissed her full on the mouth and she kissed him back thinking
something along the lines of `the hell with it'. Harry ran out of the room screaming, “MY EYES,
MY EYES!!!” Hermione sighed. “OKAY!!! On with the game PLEASE!!!” James and Lily sat up and glaring
at her, James spun the bottle. It landed on Hermione. “Uhhh…” She stammered.*

**Chapter Eight:** **The Continuation of the Last Chapter Where Rons Secret is Threatening
to Come Out of the Closet**

Ginny, Draco, Lily, James, Sirius and Ron were all chatting absently when Harry and Hermione
walked through the door. “So, you guys decided to play?” Lily asked, not making eye contact with
either of them. “Yeah.” Hermione said taking a seat in between James and Ginny answering for the
both of them. Harry rolled his eyes and sat down between James and Hermione. “Good going there,
Harry.” James whispered to Harry with a nudge in the side and a wink. James thought no one had
noticed but unfortunately Lily had been listening and James received a smack in the back of the
head. Harry smiled to himself. Too bad he didn't really have his parents. Maybe he could live
without Lily but she was only sixteen. James however, was awesome. Harry sighed before he started
listening to Sirius explain the rules.

“Okay, that's it.” Sirius said taking in a deep breath. “OH, wait!” Sirius said urgently
pulling something out of hi cloak. “This, here, is Veriterserum. It's a truth potion.” He said
taking a sip and passing it around the circle. Before Hermione drank anything she looked at it with
caution. “Oi! Just drink it already!” Ron said annoyed. Hermione quirked a brow but took a sip and
passed it the rest of the way around the circle. When everyone had nodded that they understood and
had taken a drink of the Veriterserum they started.

Sirius went first since he did come up with the idea, after all. “Okay…hmmm, Harry.” He said.
Harry perked up a little, afraid of what Sirius might make him do if he chose dare. “Um,
okay…truth.” Harry said uneasily. Sirius had a sly grin on his face that, quite frankly, was
scaring Harry. “Okay, have you been kissing Hermione?” He asked leaning foreword slightly. Lily
rolled her eyes at the sheer stupidity of it all. Harry turned a very familiar shade of red. Not
really familiar to *him.* More like what Ron looks like when he's embarrassed. Harry
contemplated whether or not to risk lying. How well could it work? I mean, really, this was Sirius.
No…it was serious. ((A/N1: Sorry, I could resist))

Harry decided not to risk it. “Yes.” He said in a low whisper. “Harry, you have to speak up,
boy!” Sirius said with a mischievous grin. “YES, OKAY!!! ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?!?!?” Harry yelled going
bright red. All this time Hermione was cowering down trying to make herself look as small as
possible and blushing so much that the shade of her face would make any Weasley proud. “It's
your turn, Harry, you get to pick someone.” James said grinning. His son was a ladies man…or so he
thought. Ron laughed before slapping his hand over his mouth. Harry's eyes narrowed before he
grinned evilly. “Okay, then, how about…Ron. Truth or Dare?” Harry asked with a grin.

“No! There are things in this world that you are not meant to know!” Ron muttered under his
breath and looked down. Ron quickly recovered. “Okay, Harry, I pick dare. I'm not afraid of
you.” Ron said puffing out his chest. “You should be.” Harry said under his breath. Ron looked at
him confusedly. “What was that?” He asked. “Oh, nothing… Okay, what to do, oh, what to do… I'VE
GOT IT!!! I dare you to kiss…” Ron's eyes widened. No…it couldn't be… Of course it was…
None other than… *dun dun dun* “DRACO MALFOY!” Harry finished narrowing his eyes at Ron. Ron sighed
happily. “YES! I've got to be the luckiest man in the whole entire world!!!” Ron said under his
breath.

“What?” Harry asked with a laugh. “I said no way.” Ron said in a slight monotone. “You have to.
It's part of the rules!” Harry said offended. “When did you make up the rules?!?!?” Ron asked
confusedly. “I didn't… Hermione did.” Harry said as if it was the most obvious thing in the
world. “NO! I did not!” Hermione said looking away from Harry. Harry gasped audibly. “You lied to
me? I'm so hurt right now!” Harry said crossing his arms. “Okay…moving on…” Hermione said not
able to look at Harry. “Has everyone forgotten that I have to kiss the WEASEL?!?!?” Draco asked
jumping to his feet.

Ginny got up and stood by him. “It's okay, Blondie Bear… (Harry coughed loudly in the
background)… Just be sure you brush your teeth before you even try to kiss me again.” Ginny said
patting his back. “Better a weasel than a ferret…” Ron said turning up his nose. “Well,
technically, they are really the same thi…” Hermione was cut off. “Oh! We don't care!!!” Ron
said throwing his hands up in the air. “Well, fine then!!!” Hermione said forcefully, but she
sounded a little hurt. “Can we please get back on topic here, Ron, you still need to do Harry's
dare.” Her voice raising a bit when she said Harry. “Alright.” He answered back a little too
quickly. “Fine…but you better not try anything funny!!!” Draco said his eyes narrowing.

“Do I look like someone that would do that?” Ron asked defensively. Draco rolled his eyes.
“I'm not even going to answer that…it's just too easy.” Draco said with a smirk.
Okay…let's just say that it turns out Ron was happy and Draco was feeling quite ill.
Draco's eye twitched. “EWW!!! That was YUCKY!!!” Draco said wiping his mouth. He grabbed a pack
of Altoids that lay conveniently on the floor beside him and dumped the whole thing in his mouth.
“Yucky?” Ginny asked bemused. Ron turned to the corner to face the huge smile on his face. “Earth
to Ron…come in…Ron? HELLO?!?!?” Harry yelled, waving his arms around. “Alrighty, who's next?”
Ron asked an evil smile on his face.

“Ooh…me…me…over here! I know you can see me…so don't pretend you can't, Ron!” Sirius
shouted with his hands waving in the air. “Fine! I pick Sirius.” Ron said with a sigh. “YAY!!! What
do I win?” Sirius asked…ahem…seriously. ((A/N1: *insert rim shot here*) “Nothing.” Ron said rolling
his eyes. “That bites…I wanted something…not I don't want to go!!!” Sirius whined. “Okay
then…truth or dare?” Ron asked. “Well, which one is better?” He asked looking around. There was a
silence. “Okay! Nobody answer me then!” Sirius said crossing his arms.

“Hmm…………ALRIGHT! I HAVE DECIDED…drum roll please?” Sirius declared. James drummed loudly on the
floor. “I pick dare.” Sirius said simply. “Okay…that was a little drawn out. Oh, well, your dare is
that you have to ((A/N2: dun dun dun)) make Draco's mom's hair green. Now, I don't care
how you do it…but it has to be done within the next hour.” Ron said with an evil smirk not unlike
Draco's. “YAY! In all of your faces!!! I got a good one!!! So you can all just EAT IT!” Sirius
said jumping around the room in a very childish way. “I'll take that as a yes…” Ron said
smirking again.

“Okay, Padfoot, it's your turn to pick someone.” James said with a smirk. “YAY!!!” Sirius
said getting up and dancing a little jig. “Okay, I pick…Lily.” Sirius said evilly. “Fine, I pick
truth because I'm just a little afraid of you, Sirius.” Lily said with a hint of nervousness in
her voice. Sirius had the biggest grin on his face before answering. “Wrong answer, Lily, the
correct answer was dare.” Sirius said clapping his hands like a two year old. James sighed.
“Sirius, they get to pick whatever they want.” He said sounding an awful lot like Hermione.

“Aw, man, and I had the best dare too!!!” Sirius pouted. “FINE! I'll just tell James so he
can make someone else do it!” Sirius said crossing his arms. Sirius leaned over and whispered
something in James's ear. James had a mischievous grin on his face and Harry overheard the
words `Dumbledore' and `earmuffs'. “Oi, mate! That's got to be the best dare I've
ever heard!!!” James said becoming quite giddy. “Yeah, I know, I'm a genius!” Sirius said with
a proud smile. Outside you could hear the crickets chirping until everyone burst out laughing.

“What is so funny?” Sirius asked confusedly causing everyone to shake their heads because that
was all they could do while rolling on the floor. Sirius hit James on the back of the head with his
rubbery chew toy. “OW! What was that for?” James asked rubbing the back of his head tenderly.
“Something was funny and you didn't tell me!!!” Sirius said with a pout. Harry looked up at the
ceiling. “I wish Hermione was a cheerleader…” Harry said absently. ((A/N2: ADD, anyone?))

“What?!?” Hermione shrieked causing Sirius and James to cover up their ears. “Did I say that out
loud?” Harry asked still staring up at the ceiling. “Do that for your dare!!! Ask her if she ever
wanted to be cheerleader!” Sirius said hopping up and down. “How do you come up with these things?”
James asked in amusement. Ginny, Hermione and Lily looked at each other. “Boys.” They said in
unison rolling their eyes.

The game went on and on until everyone was very bored with it. Sirius had turned Narcissa's
hair green but then she tackled him and threatened to take away his chew toy if he didn't
change it back. Hermione admitted that she had wanted to be a cheerleader before but didn't
now. Lily, Hermione and Ginny had also gotten a dare to put on a concert where they'd have to
sing. James hadn't gotten picked anymore because after that everyone was afraid of what Sirius
had said.

**Sneak Peak:**

*Hermione had decided to stay in another room on account of Ron's snoring. Harry quickly
snuck into her room and at the sight of her sleeping started digging through the closet to find his
PJs. Harry turned around quickly when he heard Hermione gasp. She was now sitting in bed facing him
even though her eyes were still closed. He shrugged and continued to look for his PJs. He turned
around again when Hermione spoke. “Come here, poochie woo!”*

**A/N1:** Hey everyone. I'm glad to see that some of you found my day today so
interesting. I find that quite funny as my life if usually really boring. Anyway, thanks for taking
the time to review that. I really wasn't expecting any but I'm glad you did Anyway, I hope
you liked this chapter and I promise to have the next chapter up on Thursday Thanks for
reading!

-->



10. The Chapter Where Hermione has Dreams About Someone Punting
---------------------------------------------------------------



The Worst Summer of my Life

Rating: *PG-13* for swearing and some sexual innuendoes but nothing too bad
Status: in progress
Author: Michelle (MichelleRadcliffe) (oops, that was wrong before) Co-Author: Andrea (A/N2:)
Andrea helped my come up with some of the ideas so I feel it's only right to credit her.
Pairings: Harry/Hermione, Draco/Ginny (others you'll have to read and find out...I don't
want to give anything away...

Summary: It's the summer after fifth year and Harry has been staying at Grimmauld Place for the
summer and some visitors are coming. Some big twists are coming and hilarity ensues.

**PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING!!!**

Notes: Well, I just want to say before you read this that me and my friends wrote it for the fun
of it. It was not meant to be serious so don't feel bad if your favourite character has some
odd things happen to them. My favourite character has many bad things happen to him (It's Harry
by the way) and I laugh at it anyway so please enjoy. Nevertheless, I know I'm going to get
many flames. Please try to see the funny side of things and enjoy!

Now, to the story!

**Previously:**

*The game went on and on until everyone was very bored with it. Sirius had turned
Narcissa's hair green but then she tackled him and threatened to take away his chew toy if he
didn't change it back. Hermione admitted that she had wanted to be a cheerleader before but
didn't now. Lily, Hermione and Ginny had also gotten a dare to put on a concert where
they'd have to sing. James hadn't gotten picked anymore because after that everyone was
afraid of what Sirius had said.*

**Chapter** **Nine:** **The Chapter Where Hermione has Dreams About Someone Punting Harry
Off of a Bridge**

Hermione and Lily had gone to bed about twenty minutes ago and Ron was going to bed now. Lupin
was absently writing in a journal as he walked about the house and Sirius and James had gone to
take a joy ride in Hermione's car and had sworn Harry to secrecy and Draco was in the shower
(A/N1: *takes deep breath*). Narcissa had decided to get a hotel room because she had a headache
and no one was even being close to quiet. Ginny, however, was hiding in the bathroom…and yes, it
was the same one that Draco was in. (A/N2: *wink wink*)

Hermione had decided she couldn't handle any more of Ron's snoring and asked if she
could sleep in a different room. Harry wasn't at all happy about this but there was a bed in
the room next door and all of his new clothes were hidden in that closet. Harry sighed as he
trudged up to Hermione's temporary room and stopped when he got to the door. He heard a
murmuring sound coming from the inside and slowly opened the door. He saw Hermione sleeping in the
bed but didn't hear anything anymore. He shrugged and walked to the closet. He opened the door
and his eyes got wide as the six foot pile of clothes fell on top of him. Hoping he hadn't
woken up Hermione he proceeded to grab his new PJs and stuff the rest of the clothes back into the
closet.

Harry turned around quickly when he heard Hermione gasp. She was now sitting in bed and facing
him. It was strange because her eyes were closed. He shrugged it off again and continued to shove
clothes in the closet. He turned around again when Hermione spoke. “Come her, poochie woo!”
Hermione said in a babyish voice with her hands held out in front of her and her body still facing
Harry. Harry was extremely confused and walked a little closer to her. “Come here, give momma a
smoochie!” She said in that same babyish voice. Harry shrugged again and rolled his eyes at
Hermione's act.

He climbed up on the bed and leaned in to kiss her. Just then her eyes flew open. “Harry! What
are you doing?” She asked taking a deep breath. “Erm - giving you a smooch?” He tried holding back
a laugh. “Ugh, no… I just had a nightmare…someone punted Harry off a bridge.” She said looking
frantically around the room. “What? I got *punted* off of a bridge?” Harry asked confusedly.
Hermione finally seemed to be recovering and shook her head. “No, I used to have a dog named
Harry.” Hermione said absently. “You wha…really?” Harry asked. “Oh, what? Yeah…I named him
after...” Hermione stopped and blushed. “You named him after me?” Harry asked looking a little more
proud.

“Erm…” Hermione faltered. “What? I thought you were kind of cu…” Hermione stopped again, only to
have her hand fly over her mouth. Harry grinned from ear to ear. “You thought I was cute! You
thought I was cute!” Harry chanted dancing around the room. “Arg! Stop it! You look like an idiot.”
Hermione said rolling her eyes and throwing a pillow at him. (A/N1: Hermione said `arg'.
*giggles*) It hit Harry and he stopped and looked at her pointedly. “Yes, but a *cute* idiot.”
He said with a smile.

“Were.” Hermione said pointedly. “Now leave!” She said pointing to the door. Harry pranced out
of the room muttering `you thought I was cute, you thought I was cute!' He got into the hall
and heard the click of the door locking behind him. “WERE!” Hermione screamed through the door.
“Now I think you're hot.” She said with a giggle and lay back down. Harry began banging at the
door and screaming, “Hermione! What? Let me IN!” After a few minutes of this Harry finally went
back to bed listening to the sounds of Ron's snores.

Sirius and James had pulled up into the driveway and had astonishingly managed to drive around
without crashing into anything. Unfortunately they had driven through quite a lot of mud, not to
mention the many bushing they trampled. There was also the cat that they almost hit. Sirius had
taken it upon himself to chase after it. But don't worry, James had finally managed to restrain
him and get him back in the car. They quietly climbed onto the roof and into the bedroom window.
Unfortunately this happened to be the wrong window. They laughed when they opened the window long
enough to hear Hermione was murmuring under her breath as she slept. “Oh, Harry!” She murmured as
James shut the window. They sniggered but James looked considerably more proud.

*Ginny* waited for about fifteen more minutes before Draco finally came out of the shower.
She had a very hard time not laughing as he desperately trued to discard the box that had once held
his hair dye. As he was about to throw it in the dustbin Ginny snapped a picture and ran out of the
bathroom and into her bedroom. She locked the door and hid the camera under the mattress and fell
into a dream about…Draco. (A/N2: WOW! Really? I would have *never* guessed!)

Draco was scheming a way to get back at Ginny and was seriously asking one of the marauders for
help. He was a little hungry from all this thinking and decided to get something to eat. He opened
the cupboard and saw a can of something called `coffee'. He shrugged and pulled it down. Now…it
took him awhile to figure out how to work the coffee maker, but alas, he did. He also managed to
spill coffee beans all over the floor. He found they were very difficult to pick up.

Eventually all but one had dozed off. Draco was downstairs in the kitchen bouncing off of the
walls. No, I mean that literally. No really…I do. He drank espresso. Enough said…

“That was the weirdest dream…” Hermione said furrowing her brow as she looked up at the clock
that read 3:27. (A/N1: That's what time it is right now…) to go to the loo. She heard banging
downstairs and shrugged it off. She was tired…and had to pee. (A/N2: *shrugs*) She made her way to
the bathroom and well…you know what goes on in there…no need to go into detail. She noticed a hair
dye box in the dustbin and giggled slightly while she walked back to the bedroom.

**Sneak Peak:**

*Draco was jumping up and down and was holding what was obviously an empty coffee cup because
he had just flipped off of the edge of the table when Harry and Hermione had entered.*

**A/N1:** Sorry everyone for how late this is. I have no excuses for you this time. I've
just been having a hectic yet lazy week if that makes any sense. Well, Andrea isn't here at the
moment and I'm figuring that you all would rather have your chapter now. So hoorah! Thanks for
all the review! Hope you enjoyed this!

-->



11. The Chapter Where Everyone Wakes Up and Draco is Obsessed wi
----------------------------------------------------------------



The Worst Summer of my Life

Rating: *PG-13* for swearing and some sexual innuendoes but nothing too bad
Status: in progress
Author: Michelle (MichelleRadcliffe) (oops, that was wrong before) Co-Author: Andrea (A/N2:)
Andrea helped my come up with some of the ideas so I feel it's only right to credit her.
Pairings: Harry/Hermione, Draco/Ginny (others you'll have to read and find out...I don't
want to give anything away...

Summary: It's the summer after fifth year and Harry has been staying at Grimmauld Place for the
summer and some visitors are coming. Some big twists are coming and hilarity ensues.

**PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING!!!**

Notes: Well, I just want to say before you read this that me and my friends wrote it for the fun
of it. It was not meant to be serious so don't feel bad if your favourite character has some
odd things happen to them. My favourite character has many bad things happen to him (It's Harry
by the way) and I laugh at it anyway so please enjoy. Nevertheless, I know I'm going to get
many flames. Please try to see the funny side of things and enjoy!

Now, to the story!

**Previously:**

*“Erm…” Hermione faltered. “What? I thought you were kind of cu…” Hermione stopped again, only
to have her hand fly over her mouth. Harry grinned from ear to ear. “You thought I was cute! You
thought I was cute!” Harry chanted dancing around the room. “Arg! Stop it! You look like an idiot.”
Hermione said rolling her eyes and throwing a pillow at him. (A/N1: Hermione said `arg'.
*giggles*) It hit Harry and he stopped and looked at her pointedly. “Yes, but a cute idiot.” He
said with a smile.*

**Chapter Ten:** **The Chapter Where Everyone Wakes Up and Draco is Obsessed with Coffee and
all Things Caffeinated**

Harry woke the next morning feeling groggy and annoyed. Ron was still sleeping so Harry quietly
got p and without even thinking walked out of the room still in his boxers. (A/N1: YUM!!!). He
yawned sleepily as he opened the door to Hermione's room. Completely forgetting anyone else was
even there he opened the closet door but anticipated the clothes falling and caught most of them.
He grabbed a pair of jeans and a tee shirt and walked out the door. He thought he heard a slight
giggle from inside but was too tired to think anything of it.

Inside the room Hermione had been awake the whole time watching him out of the corner of her
eye. Boy did those Quidditch practices do him good! She sighed and got up rolling her eyes at the
still ajar door of the closet. She quickly got dressed and headed downstairs for breakfast. Harry
had gone downstairs to change and Hermione met up with him in the hallway to go to breakfast. They
were chatting, as best friends do, and nothing in particular when Harry opened up the kitchen door.
Hermione gasped audibly at the site in front of her.

Draco was jumping up and down holding what was obviously an empty coffee cup because he flipped
off the edge of the table when they'd entered. Harry and Hermione stood there speechless as
Draco ran around the kitchen until he tried to run under the low ceiling fan. He fell over with a
`thud' and was lying stiffly on the floor the coffee cup still clutched in his hand. Harry
laughed which caused Hermione to glare at him. Harry shrugged sitting down on the floor beside her.
Hermione checked his pulse and sighed when he twitched slightly before sitting up and rubbing the
back of his head.

Hermione giggled and stood back up walking to the counter where Draco had spilled the coffee
beans. Hermione help up the now empty can that once held expresso coffee. Hermione looked at Harry
for an explanation as to why he had expresso coffee in his house. Harry squirmed a little before
answering. “Well, sometimes I can't sleep.” He said looking at the floor. Hermione looked
saddened by this and walked over to him. Draco was watching them confusedly as he stood up.

Hermione looked like she was about to say something to Harry before winking at him and kissing
him firmly on the lips. Harry's' arms were now around Hermione's' waist and her
hands were again, in his hair. Draco gagged as he ran out of the room. Harry and Hermione broke
apart and Hermione giggled. Harry looked around the coffee covered kitchen and turned to Hermione.
“Do you want to go out for breakfast?” He asked with a hint of nervousness in his voice. Hermione
smiled and nodded. Harry smiled back as they walked out of the kitchen hand in hand.

Draco ran up the stairs and right into Ginny. Draco's eyes narrowed and he grabbed at her.
She simply backed up and held a finger. “Now, now…you wouldn't want anything leaking out about
you? I mean…one picture could get lost easily…let's say maybe in Harry's' room? One
little picture…” Ginny held a picture that showed him looking embarrassed at the camera with a box
of dye in his hand. He grabbed the picture and Ginny let him have it with no fuss.

She watched him, amused, as he tore it up into little itty bitty pieces. He threw the pieces of
the picture and stomped on them for good measure. She just giggled. “What?!?” He asked stopping.
“Oh, well, I'm not stupid you know. I made *plenty* of copies.” Ginny said with an
emphasis on plenty. He looked at her, stomped his foot, and ran into his room like a…two
ye…wait…like a teenager. (A/N: *laughs* I guess it just described me so well that I…nevermind.)
Ginny smiled and skipped downstairs and outside.

Narcissa walked into the back door, yawning. She wandered into the kitchen and looked around.
There were coffee beans everywhere. Not to mention the big puddle of coffee in the middle of the
floor. She sighed and poured herself a cup. She didn't see anyone there so she just assumed
that everyone was either still sleeping or they all went out. She shrugged and picked up the `Daily
Prophet'.

Sirius was in his dog form and chasing his tail when James awoke. James laughed at Sirius as he
pulled on a shirt. Sirius shifted back into human form but continued to run around in circles like
he had a tail. “Padfoot, err, you're not a dog anymore…” James said trying to hold in his
laughter. “So?” Sirius asked as he bent down and grabbed his rubber steak off the floor with his
teeth. “So, so, suck your toe all the way to Mexico…” James said under his breath as he walked out
of the room leaving Sirius alone with his…steak…

Hermione jumped into the front seat of the car and Harry stopped and swayed. He looked as if he
was about to ask something and then stopped. “Oh, come on, Harry, out with it!” She said giggling
at the end. “Can you teach me how to drive?” Harry asked looking up at her. She grinned. “Of
course, it would be my pleasure.” Hermione said scooting over into the passenger side. *This is
going to be an interesting day…* Hermione thought absently as Harry turned the key.

James, Lupin and Sirius were no where to be found that morning. Draco, Narcissa and Ginny could
not find anyone, in fact. Draco kept making jokes about how Harry and Hermione were probably just
snogging in a closet somewhere. Narcissa, however unfunny Draco's jokes were, cracked up every
single time. Ginny continued to look around until she found the marauders outside with small dirt
piles everywhere.

“What are you doing?” Ginny yelled at two of the marauders that were in sight. “Where's
James?” Draco asked looking around. Lupin pointed to an opening in the ground. Narcissa was
watching all this, laughing occasionally. Draco and Ginny peeked down into the hole and there was
James about six feet deep
(A/N: Okay, weird…6 feet…I know…). “We're digging a hole through the whole earth!” Sirius said
up at the surface jumping up and down excitedly.

Hermione was gripping the dash like her life depended on it…and maybe it did. Harry had a
mischievous look on his face and was driving like a maniac. Hermione's' eyes widened as
Harry swerved in and out of oncoming traffic like he'd been driving for years.
“I…thought…you…didn't know….*how* to drive!” Hermione screamed over the sound of the
traffic with difficulty. Harry grinned at her quickly and turned to face the road again.

Narcissa had gone back inside after watching Sirius chase his `tail' for about ten minutes.
Also, she was extremely bored and was in dire need of doing some magic. Ginny and Draco were
snooping around outside (A/N1: Uh oh…I think Draco rubbed off on her… (NO! Not like that you
perverts!)) Ginny saw a shed hidden behind some bushes and made her way over to it... She wound her
way around it and found a door and a trail leading from it on the other side. She grinned and was
instantly glad Fred and George were her brothers as she spotted the lock on the door. She pulled a
bobby pin out of her hair and put her ear up to the lock.

“Ginny?!?” She heard Draco yell from the other side of the bushes. “Just a second!” She said not
taking her attention away from the bobby pin in her hand or the lock at her ear. She heard a
`click' and slid the lock of the latch. She opened the door and her eyes widened and her face
sported an all-too-familiar mischievous grin as her eyes rested on the sight in front of her.

James suddenly screamed for help and Lupin and Sirius quickly lowered a long rope into the, now
12 feet deep, hole. He clamoured to the top and stood gasping for air. “What did you see, what
happened?” Lupin asked peering into the hole. “I saw a monster!” James exclaimed his eyes wide.
“What was it?” Lupin asked curiously. “A monster you dolt!” Sirius said matter-of-factly. Lupin
just rolled his eyes and turned back to James who was still panting. “Well, it was like a snake,
only it had legs…” James said puzzled. Lupin laughed and James looked at him annoyed. “It
wasn't funny, it tried to eat me!” James said seriously. “Is this the monster?” Lupin asked
holding up a lizard that had just crawled out of the hole.

Harry pulled up into the parking lot of Perkins and parked in the closest parking space
available. “Harry! That's a handicapped space!” Hermione scolded him. “Well, what have those
people ever done? Get old and frail?” Harry asked. “Well…yes…but that still doesn't give you
the right….” Hermione shook her head at him.

“Well, have they ever had to battle an evil villain or fought a basilisk, or been on the run
from a killer who is really your godfather, or fought a dragon, or dived down into a lake infested
with God knows what to save their best mate and then find out that the one they love is in danger
too, did they find out that they did all this and it really might be someone else who was supposed
to go through all this, did they ever watch helplessly as ones they loved died? Did they live in a
cupboard under the stairs for eleven years being their Aunt and Uncles personal slave?”

He stopped and cocked his head to the side as if he'd never really thought about all the
things he's endured before. Hermione had a confused expression on her face but then it quickly
sported a look of realization and then, finally, sadness. “What is it?” Harry asked, not realizing
all he'd said. “You lived in a cupboard under the stairs? For *eleven* years?” Hermione
asked disbelieving. “Well…err…no?” Harry tried. Hermione shook her head. “You know I know you
better than that…” Hermione said sadly. “Well, Hermione it's not a big deal. I'm
fine...see?” Harry said spinning around once for emphasis. “Yes you are…” Hermione said eyeing him.
“What was that?” Harry asked when he was facing her again. “Erm…nothing…” Hermione said blushing.
“Err…let's go inside.” Hermione said motioning to the door.

Draco heard a door open on the other side of the bushes and walked towards it. He saw Ginny on
the other side looking at some sort of…something. To be honest he had no idea what it was. “What is
that?” Draco asked as Ginny walked into the small shed. “This” Ginny said, straddling it. “This is
a motorcycle.” She said with an evil grin on her face before revving the engine. “You don't
even know who it belongs to.” Draco looked at her in disbelief. Maybe he had been a bad influence
on her. “It's Harry's'. He won't mind. Harry on a motorcycle…hmmm.” Ginny smiled
widely and looked as if she was envisioning it in her head. “Ginny!” Draco said walking into the
shed. He was spun around when Ginny shot out of the shed like a bullet.

“So what do you want to do?” James asked Sirius. They had given up on the whole `hole through
the Earth' thing when James refused to go back into the hole. “I dunno…what do *you* want
to do?” Sirius asked. “I dunno…what do *you* want to do?” James asked. “I dunno…what do
*you* want to do?”

Narcissa had gone inside and was now attempting to recreate Vin Diesel. She hadn't
*exactly* gotten it right yet, but she had managed to create about 75 rabbits which were now
hopping around the room. She shrieked as another rabbit materialized in front of her. She edged a
little further away from it before almost falling off of the table and into the `evil fluffy pit of
doom'. She had been standing on top of the table for the last half hour while trying to get rid
of the horrifying rabbits hopping around underneath her. She pushed the rabbit off the edge of the
table, screaming when its' ear touched her leg.

Harry shrugged it off hurrying in front of Hermione and pulling the door open for her. “Thanks.”
Hermione said breathing a sigh of relief. They were directed to a table and they sat down. Hermione
grabbed a menu and looked though it intently. When Harry had yet to even glance at the menu
Hermione looked at him. “Aren't you going to look at the menu?” Hermione asked. Harry had a
smirk on his face like he was plotting something. “Oh!” Harry said snapping out of his daze. He
picked up the menu to hide his `I've got an idea' look.

**Sneak Peak:**

*Sirius and James were still in the sitting room. “I dunno…whadda you wanna do?” Sirius
droned. “I dunno…what do you wanna do?” James replied just as bored. “I dunno…HEY!” Sirius said
jumping up. “We could spy on someone.” Sirius said giddily. “Yeah!” James said happily. “But whom
to spy on…” James said thoughtfully his hand at his chin. “So, who do you want to spy on?” Sirius
asked. “I dunno, who do you want to spy on?” James asked.*

**A/N1:** Wow guys. I'm glad I didn't receive any - um - threatening reviews telling
me to update this. Andrea and I are working really - very- hard on this story right now. We've
come up with some brand new titles and ideas for chapters that are brilliant. In fact I'm going
to share an idea with you now -

Okay - so Draco gets a water park for his birthday they all go - things happen - it'll be
fun.

That's all I can tell you. But trust me; you'll love it. Anyway, that's why I
haven't update for a long - LONG time. I'm going to be changing the titles accordingly and
re-posting chapters for the next week or so. Then you'll get another chapter. But I made this
one especially long just for you. Also - Merry Late Christmas (or Happy Holidays if you prefer)
anyway - thanks for not killing me.

-->



12. The Chapter Where Ron Meets Squishy and Harry Carries Out Hi
----------------------------------------------------------------



The Worst Summer of my Life

Rating: *PG-13* for swearing and some sexual innuendoes but nothing too bad
Status: in progress
Author: Michelle (MichelleRadcliffe) (oops, that was wrong before) Co-Author: Andrea (A/N2:)
Andrea helped my come up with some of the ideas so I feel it's only right to credit her.
Pairings: Harry/Hermione, Draco/Ginny (others you'll have to read and find out...I don't
want to give anything away...

Summary: It's the summer after fifth year and Harry has been staying at Grimmauld Place for the
summer and some visitors are coming. Some big twists are coming and hilarity ensues.

**PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING!!!**

Notes: Well, I just want to say before you read this that me and my friends wrote it for the fun
of it. It was not meant to be serious so don't feel bad if your favourite character has some
odd things happen to them. My favourite character has many bad things happen to him (It's Harry
by the way) and I laugh at it anyway so please enjoy. Nevertheless, I know I'm going to get
many flames. Please try to see the funny side of things and enjoy!

Now, to the story!

**Previously:**

*Harry shrugged it off hurrying in front of Hermione and pulling the door open for her.
“Thanks.” Hermione said breathing a sigh of relief. They were directed to a table and they sat
down. Hermione grabbed a menu and looked though it intently. When Harry had yet to even glance at
the menu Hermione looked at him. “Aren't you going to look at the menu?” Hermione asked. Harry
had a smirk on his face like he was plotting something. “Oh!” Harry said snapping out of his daze.
He picked up the menu to hide his `I've got an idea' look.*

**Chapter Ten: The Chapter Where Ron Meets Squishy and Harry Carries out his Plan**

Ron awoke (I know…I forgot about him…whoops…) to the sound of Narcissa's screech and quickly
pulled on a tee shirt and some pants. He yawned loudly and swaggered downstairs. *I'm
hungry…* Ron thought absently as he made his way to the kitchen. He hung his head sleepily as he
opened the kitchen door. A bunny hopped out of the kitchen and picked it up smiling widely.
“Who's a cute little bun bun? Yes you are! Yes you are…” Ron said in baby-talk. He held it like
a baby and looked at the ceiling deep in thought. “I shall name you squishy and you shall be mine!
You shall be my squishy!” Ron said happily as he bounded outside with the bunny in his hands.

Ginny rounded the block one last time before almost running into Draco who was waving his arms
like a maniac trying to get her to stop. She glared at him and pulled into the small shed. Draco
waited outside before she emerged with her arms folded and an annoyed look on her face. “Don't
tell.” She said between gritted teeth. “But I thought that you said that he…” Draco started but
Ginny cut him off. “Don't tell!” Ginny said a little more forcefully. Draco's eyes'
widened before cowering in fear as Ginny stomped off muttering something about `ferrets' and
`payback'.

Harry had ended up ordering the same thing as Hermione anyway. “Harry?” Hermione asked. Harry
looked up. “Yeah?” He asked, clearly not listening. Hermione noticed this. “You know they make the
pancakes out of ground up bibles.” Hermione said matter-of-factly. Harry didn't even look up as
he muttered `yeah'. Hermione scowled. Harry stood up. “Where are you going?” Hermione asked
still scowling. “Loo, be right back.” He said walking away. Hermione rolled her eyes and took a
drink of her orange juice.

Harry returned a couple minutes later to see that the food had arrived and sat down. Hermione
watched him eat for about 30 seconds looking at him oddly before snapping out of it. She took in a
breath and was about to say something when about six staff members appeared at the table. Harry
didn't even look up; actually, he appeared to focus on his pancakes more. “What is…?” Hermione
didn't even finish her sentence when one of the staff pulled balloons out from behind his back.
They started clapping in unison. “Happy, happy birthday from all of us to you. We're glad you
came to see us so we can party, too. HEY! We're so excited; we hope that you are too. So happy,
happy birthday from all the Perkins crew. HEY! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” They sang while Hermione looked at
them horrified as they handed her the balloons and walked away.

Sirius and James were still in the sitting room. “I dunno…whadda you wanna do?” Sirius droned.
“I dunno…what do you wanna do?” James replied just as bored. “I dunno…HEY!” Sirius said jumping up.
“We could spy on someone.” Sirius said giddily. “Yeah!” James said happily. “But whom to spy on…”
James said thoughtfully his hand at his chin. “So, who do *you* want to spy on?” Sirius asked.
“I dunno, who do *you* want to spy on?” James asked.

Ron smiled happily as he danced around the front yard with the bunny in his arms. All of the
sudden Ron got a disgusted look on his face and dropped the bunny revealing a large wet spot on his
shirt. “EW!!!” Ron said waving his arms in the air and running around in circles. Needless to say
the bunny hopped away. A car drove passed and a short while later you heard the screeching of
brakes. Ron saw the car back up into his view again and he quickly turned around. “Hey!” Said an
American girl who Ron didn't know. Ron turned to face her. “Can I help you?” He asked in a
mature voice.

“Um, I think so…does Harry live here?” She asked looking around behind him. *Stupid Harry, he
gets everything…Hermione…whoever this is…a house …money …looks …that really cool scar…* Ron
thought to himself half absently half angrily. “He's not here right now.” Ron said turning
around. “Well, is Hermione here?” She asked. Ron sighed and turned around again. “No, she's out
with Harry.” He said bleakly. She smiled to herself. “Can I wait?” She asked. Ron shrugged. “Not my
house but sure…go on in, make yourself at home.” He said motioning to the door.

Draco sighed as she walked into the house. He sat down on the ground and was looking around the
yard when he noticed something hidden between some trees and bushes. It looked as if it was covered
in vines. He stood up and walked over to it, perplexed. It seemed to be white as he started pulling
off the vines. He noticed that it was painted and seemed to be chipping. He shrugged and pulled off
the rest of the vines revealing some sort of white metal box.

Ginny walked into the house grinned evilly when she saw a bunny. Draco, like his mom, was scared
to death of bunnies. He had told Ginny this to get the pictures back (although he didn't know
Ginny still had one hidden). She saw two more bunnies and started to walk past them before she
turned around all of the sudden. *Why in hell are there bunnies in here?!?!?* Ginny asked
herself. She heard a screech from the kitchen and rushed in to reveal about a hundred or so more
bunnies and a screeching Narcissa on top of the table. “What are you doing?!?!?” Ginny asked her
voice rising. Narcissa gave her a fleeting glance. “Get…me…out…of…here.” Narcissa whispered loudly
as if making sure that the bunnies didn't hear plan.

Megan had made herself at home and proceeded in looking through everyone's sock drawer. She
had made it to Harry's' room and grinned evilly as she walked quickly but quietly to his
dresser on the other side of the room. She mentally asked herself *boxers or briefs?* Before
opening the top drawer to reveal some shirts. She groaned inwardly and quickly opened the next
drawer to reveal a bunch of socks. She smiled. *Jackpot.* She dug through them quickly before
pulling out a small black book. She smiled, pocketed the book, and proceeded to look through the
rest of the drawers and found nothing. She opened the last drawer and smiled. *Boxers.*

Hermione smiled politely until they were out of site. She groaned when Harry gave her the
`innocent look' and then continued eating. A guy about Hermione's' age walked to them.
“Hey, Happy birthday.” He said smiling flirtily and winking at her. Harry looked as if his eyes
could shoot daggers at this guy. Hermione smiled at the guy and pulled a pen out of her purse. She
grabbed his hand and quickly wrote down seven digits before he went on his way. *That'll
teach him to mess with me.* Hermione thought to herself. Harry's' eyes were now about
the size of slits and a scowl was on his face. Hermione gave him one look and burst out laughing.
“What?” Harry asked coldly which only made Hermione laugh harder. “I don't even know whose
phone number that was.” Hermione said with a giggle.

Draco pondered what the metal box could possibly be. He sighed and went inside to ask Ginny. He
hummed along as he walked in the door only to be greeted by a hallway of bunnies. He shrieked and
ran across the yard and hopped into the metal box. He peeked out of the door to see that no bunnies
had followed him out the door. He sighed and leaned comfortable back into the side of the inside of
the box. He felt like he was spinning around and around until finally the spinning stopped. He felt
like he was going to be sick so he hastily clamoured out of the box and looked around. Where was
he? He saw strange metal birds flying in the air and ducked for cover when one got within 10,000
feet of himself.

Draco panicked thinking that magic had somehow been discovered by these people. A newspaper was
blown conveniently against his feet and he quickly picked it up. It read *June 12, 2004.*
Draco threw the paper back down. He stood there for a moment. *2004? 2004?!?!?* Draco thought
frantically running after the paper blowing down the street. He followed the paper to what seemed
to be some sort of downtown. He watched helplessly as the paper fell into the river. “NOOOOOO!!!”
He cried dropping to his knees.

Ginny watched, stifling a laugh, as Draco ran out the door screaming like a girl. She laughed
and performed a quick spell, conjuring a pen outside the window. She opened the window and one by
one, painstakingly, put the bunnies into the pen.

Ron watched Megan walk inside. He sighed and looked down for Squishy. Ron gasped. Where was he?
Ron, panicking, ran inside and saw Ginny leaning out of the side window. “Ginny!” He yelled
marching over to her. Ginny looked up with a `caught' look but softened when she realized it
was Ron. “What?” She said as he got closer. Ron, not seeing the pen, gasped when she bent down out
of site and came back up with a bunny. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH SQUISHY?!?!?” Ron yelled at her
accusingly.

Sirius sniggered loudly behind the bushes only to have a hand clamp over his mouth. He licked
James' hand and James simply wiped it on his back. James was holding a white bunny that had
escaped Ron's attention long enough for it to break free.

After walking aimlessly around for a few minutes and not seeing anyone Draco decided to look for
some people inside. He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw a club down the street. He ran all the
way to it and was out of breath when he got there. (A/N: Note that it was 10 feet away.) He caught
his breath before opening the door and walking inside. He looked up at the stage when he got inside
and gasped at the sight in front of him.

**Sneak Peak:**

*Harry heard an annoyingly familiar tune come onto the radio. He groaned inwardly when 1000
Miles by Vanessa Carlton sifted through the speakers. He'd definitely heard that song way more
than enough times last summer when Dudley had it playing loudly in his room constantly because it
was, after all, his favourite song. He had a look of horror on his face when Hermione started
singing along and cringed noticeably. The car screeched to a halt. Harry's' eyes widened
when Hermione turned to face him with a not-too-happy look on her face.*

**A/N1:** Well, guys, I still felt bad about before so I was up until five am typing this
chapter up I hope this kinda, sorta, maybe makes up for it a little. Anyway, I hope you like the
story R&R Happy New Year

-->



13. The Chapter Where I Figured Out These Titles Suck and Starte
----------------------------------------------------------------



The Worst Summer of my Life

Rating: *PG-13* for swearing and some sexual innuendoes but nothing too bad
Status: in progress
Author: Michelle (PottersGirl13) (A/N1:)
Co-Author: Andrea (A/N2:)
Andrea helped my come up with some of the ideas so I feel it's only right to credit her.
Pairings: Harry/Hermione, Draco/Ginny (others you'll have to read and find out...I don't
want to give anything away...

Summary: It's the summer after fifth year and Harry has been staying at Grimmauld Place for the
summer and some visitors are coming. Some big twists are coming and hilarity ensues.

**PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING!!!**

Notes: Well, I just want to say before you read this that me and my friends wrote it for the fun
of it. It was not meant to be serious so don't feel bad if your favourite character has some
odd things happen to them. My favourite character has many bad things happen to him (It's Harry
by the way) and I laugh at it anyway so please enjoy. Nevertheless, I know I'm going to get
many flames. Please try to see the funny side of things and enjoy!

Now, to the story!

**Previously:**

*After walking aimlessly around for a few minutes and not seeing anyone Draco decided to look
for some people inside. He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw a club down the street. He ran all
the way to it and was out of breath when he got there. (A/N: Note that it was 10 feet away.) He
caught his breath before opening the door and walking inside. He looked up at the stage when he got
inside and gasped at the sight in front of him.*

**Chapter Five: The Chapter When I Figured Out These Titles Suck and Started Working on New
Ones**

Megan looked around the upstairs some more before running into Narcissa. Narcissa smiled evilly
before escorting a very curious Megan to a dark corner she hadn't noticed before. Narcissa
looked around making sure no one was looking before opening a door that appeared only after
Narcissa had muttered a few words that, to Megan, sounded Latin. Narcissa flipped on a light and
pulled a key out of her pocket. Megan waited anxiously as Narcissa used that key to open a box with
a set of keys that opened the twenty or so locks on the closet door. Narcissa unlocked the last
lock and opened the closet door that only made Megans' mischievous grin to widen.

Sirius and James were back inside and peeking around and the corner at the mysterious that had
appeared and disappeared again. They stayed low in their position waiting for the two women to come
back out so they could snoop around the Room of Torment and Mystery as they so cleverly dubbed
it.

Draco stood there stunned at the sight in front of him. There on stage was Draco. Well, an older
Draco anyway. He was singing a rap song with a few other guys and above the stage in bright glowing
letters was EMINEM. `Why would I change my name to Eminem?' Draco thought as he watched for a
few more minutes as girls threw what looked like underwear up on the stage making younger Draco
smile widely before departing from the club.

Harry followed Hermione begrudgingly to the car and scowled when she refused to let him drive. I
believe the wording was `There is NO WAY in HELL I'm EVER letting YOU drive My car
AGAIN…EVER!'. Harry sighed and got into the passenger seat. Hermione turned on the engine and
flipped on the radio. After about 5 or 6 minutes of Hermione browsing through stations she finally
pulled out of the parking lot.

Harry heard an annoyingly familiar tune come onto the radio. He groaned inwardly when 1000 Miles
by Vanessa Carlton sifted through the speakers. He'd definitely heard that song way more than
enough times last summer when Dudley had it playing loudly in his room constantly because it was,
after all, his favorite song. He had a look of horror on his face when Hermione started singing
along and cringed noticeably. The car screeched to a halt. Harrys' eyes widened when Hermione
turned to face him with a not-too-happy look on her face.

“Harry…” She started. “You think I'm a bad singer?” She asked threateningly. Harrys'
mouth opened, closed, and then opened again. “Come on Harry…spit it out.” She said darkly.
“Erm…no…Hermione, you're a wonderful singer.” He said with a sigh. Hermione, however,
wasn't happy with this answer. “Harry, don't you lie to me!” She threatened. Harry threw
his hands in the air. “WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME, WOMAN?!?!?” He screamed.

Ginny gave Ron a glace that Ron knew all too well. `What in Gods' name are you talking about
you moron?'. Ron looked saddened by this but shrugged it off because he is only able to have
one emotion at a time and now that emotion was anger. “MY SQUISHY!!!” Ron demanded holding out his
hand. Ginny rolled her eyes and pointed to the pit of bunnies below her. She quickly shut the
window and locked it before Ron could say anything else. Ron danced a little jig because now he had
80 Squishys!!!

Ginny looked around the house for Draco. She was feeling up to a snog session and didn't
really feel like snogging Ron who was the only boy she could find. (A/N: Thank God.) She ran
outside but didn't see him out there either. She trudged back inside and ran upstairs as a last
resort. She ran into each room but didn't see him anywhere.

Megan looked around the room in the closet in awe. Not only was there boxes of private things
belonging to the people staying in the house but there was a full surveillance system set up and
the TVs were right in front of her. She saw that Ginny was in the kitchen and that Sirius and James
were in the hallway. Lupin was downstairs reading a book in the sitting room and Ron was out in the
yard dancing around happily. It looked like Harry and Hermione were still out so Megan and Narcissa
pulled out the boxes. Before Narcissa would let Megan look she held out her hand as if expecting
payment. Begrudgingly Megan pulled the little black book out of her pocket and handed it to
Narcissa who quickly locked it in a drawer labeled `Examine'.

Sirius and James got tired of waiting for so long for Narcissa and Megan to come back out.
Granted, it had only been two minutes but unfortunately they had found some sugar. Pure sugar. Five
pounds of it. (A/N: Uh oh…DUN DUN DUN…think Draco on coffee times 4) They ran down the stairs and
found Lupin in the sitting room sitting (A/N: Pardon the pun). Lupin gave them a fleeting glance as
they walked in the room. They pulled up chairs on either side of a nervous looking Moony. “We need
your help.” James said his mischievous smile matching Sirius'.

Draco wondered around keeping a look out for the dryer so he could go back to 1996. He spotted a
few people coming out of buildings on the other side of town and ran all the way to the dryer which
he just spotted and climbed in. Draco sat inside it for a little while before realizing it
wasn't going to work just by itself. Peeking out to make sure no one was watching Draco climbed
out and looked at the dials. Seeing how it worked (miraculously) he set the dials to 1996 and got
back in. The dryer started spinning faster and faster and it was, quite frankly, making Draco sick.
The dryer stopped spinning and Draco tumbled out.

The rest of the way home Hermione had a slight grin on her face and Harry kept his eyes wide
shooting nervous glances her way every ten seconds.

Harry and Hermione walked up to the house hand in hand. Things had cooled down a little between
them so it was nothing really. Harry opened the door for her giving her a devilish grin. Hermione
blushed and walked upstairs to see where everyone was. Ginny came rushing around the corner with a
huge smile on her face. Upon seeing that it was Harry and Hermione her smile faded greatly.
“I'm happy to see you too, Ginny.” Hermione said sarcastically. Ginny sighed. “Sorry, it's
just I'm looking for Draco and I can't seem to find him anywhere.” She said looking over
Hermione's' shoulder. “Why would you want to find that slimy little ferr - “ Harry stopped
mid word at the sharp pain in his side.

Ron saw Draco come around the side of the house a dazed look on his face. Ron walked over to him
nervously. “Erm - hi Draco.” Ron said looking down and blushing. Draco murmured something that
could have very possibly been `hi' but it was hard to tell because he was slurring his words a
lot. Ron was disappointed by this but accepted it as fate that he would never be with Draco the
`forbidden fruit'. (A/N: Sorry! It was building up inside of me and I just couldn't take it
anymore!)

Megan found a small box labeled `Rons' Room' and picked it up. She opened it and found
pictures of Draco. She looked up at Narcissa who shrugged. All-of-the-sudden Megan was wearing a
cape and had little devil horns and a trident. She laughed evilly, rubbing her hands together. “I
will get to the bottom of this.” She said mischievously. Narcissa looked up at her, confused. “Why
are you wearing a cape and rubbing your hands together?” Narcissa asked. “Oh, no reason.” Megan
replied going back to the boxes.

Sirius and James explained to Lupin what they had in mind quickly. “So…tell me…again, if you
will, *why* exactly you want to bake a giant chocolate chip cookie.” He said looking from one
to the other. They looked at each other and then, since neither knew, shrugged. Lupin rolled his
eyes and led them to the kitchen.

Ginny had left Harry and Hermione alone after they had finally convinced her that they knew
nothing of Dracos' current whereabouts. (A/N: Sorry…I had to write something intelligent…while
writing this I can actually feel my brain turning to mush) Hermione turned to look at Harry and saw
Ron come bursting through the door. She pulled Harry out of the way just before Ron flew through
the hall…no literally…

**Flashback**

*Ron saw that Draco was a little out of it and grinned evilly. He ran after him and stopped
him a little ways before he got to the house. Ron grabbed his shoulders and leaned into (A/N: Well,
you know…no need to go into detail and give us all nightmares.) Suddenly Draco snapped back into
reality just as Ron was about to…(A/N: See the above). Draco whipped out his wand and sent him
crashing through the door of the house. Draco quickly put his hands in his pocket and walked away
whistling a nice, happy tune that somehow reminds me of `sooomewherrrrrrrrre over the
raaaainboooooooow waaaaaaaaaaay up hiiiiiiiiiigh'.*

****End Flashback**

Harry and Hermione saw that Ron was bleeding pretty bad and saw that a rather large piece of
wood was sticking through his arm. Ron twitched violently and then fell into unconsciousness. Harry
and Hermione looked down at him and continued on with their conversation leaving him to rot like
the weas…(A/N: Me: What? Readers: You can't do that! Harry and Hermione wouldn't do that!
Me: MWHAHAHAHA DIE, RON, DIE!!!)

(A/N: *cough*) Okay, okay!

Harry and Hermione rushed to Ron and helped him up. With one of his arms slug over each they got
him over to the couch and brought in some nice warm butterbeer for him. (A/N: Are you happy
now?!?!?)

**Sneak Peak:**

*“Now, all we need is…ah, yes, sugar.” Lupin said. James and Sirius started whistling and
glancing around the room, unable to make eye contact with Lupin. “Okay, what did you do?” Lupin
asked exasperatedly. “Nothing! Why would you think we did something?!?!? I mean…do we look like
we'd do something wrong?” Sirius and James yelled defensively in unison and with a flick of
their wands a faint halo appeared above their heads as they smiled innocently at Lupin.*

**A/N1:** Hey all, I'm glad you're all (most of you) are keeping up with this story -
it's strange that it's strange yet so long. If you're looking for my humor then you
could check out my new One Shot `NEWTs, the Flu and Chocolate' I think it turned out great.
Thanks for reading!!!

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14. BEST EVER
-------------



First of all - Portkey, don't kick me off for doing this. I'll delete it if it's a
problem but let me know before you kick me off *begs*

Hello everyone - now before you click out of this because (and I'm warning you now) it's
not a chapter - I wanted to let you know that I've been working on something that I think is
very cool this last week. Hence the no update thing. It's a website. *waits* Now that
you've calmed down… I took it about as far as you could on Tripod. I mean - it's illegal to
make money off of fanfictions so I'm broke I don't know why this never occurred to me
sooner. The site has all of my stories on it - of course - they are hosted here on Portkey
(they're only links) but there is a “little game” on there as well. Stretching to the beyonds
for Tripod web pages I've hidden (not very well) a snitch somewhere on the site - it is a
direct link to a hidden page that you can't get to on the navigation. There's chapter
thirteen of The Worst Summer of my Life! I was so proud of myself when I thought of it. Anyway -
all of my stories are posted on there including “screen captures” of the stories. There aren't
any - well, there's one. But I'm looking people! The one I have now is for Trust and
Betrayal - evil!Harry. It's kind of scary looking. Perfectly normal Harry edited to my fancy
(ignore that, I couldn't think of another word). Anyway, if any of you wanted to know what
Hermione saw when she looked into his eyes - check it out! There is news on there as well, along
with a brand new forum! It's really quite cool! I love it. Oh, and if I don't have you
convinced yet - I have some (real, yes, real) pics of AlmostHalfNaked!Dan. Kept me on a Dan high
for the rest of the day. PLEASE check it out - if not only to ridicule me. But I spent your whole
week of working on the story on this site - so PLEASE look at it. You'll see why I haven't
updated.

http://michelleradcliffe.tripod.com/michelleandalex/

Other things on there:

- News about our/my stories

- Quotes from our stories

- A Photo Gallery with funny pictures (HP)

- A page with all the cool stuff we wish we made (where we got our sense of humor!)

- Links to all of our fictions (and the newest chapter)

- A Chat Forum !!!

Thanks!

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